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doesitgetbetter ( member #18429) posted at 4:57 PM on Friday, June 14th, 2013
I didn't get more than 4 hours of sleep on any night for the first 18 months after DDay. No matter what I tried, I always woke up at 4 hours or less. It was awful! Sleeping pills didn't even help.
Glad to report that after that 18th month, I've had no problems sleeping since then. Whew!!!!
DDay - Dec '07
Me - BS
Him - WS
Us - working on R - again
May 18, 2010 - I forgave him fully!
D-day 2 July 4, 2015, turns out he is a SAWH, status, working harder than before
May 22, 2019 -slip/relapse. He forgot he has to work forever
FeelingSoMuch (original poster member #38814) posted at 9:01 PM on Friday, June 14th, 2013
Well, I stopped the sleeping pills cold turkey after three months. It was hard to fall asleep at first and I still wake up at 3 or 4 in the morning thinking about the stupid A.
Having said all that, I now think that my WW would be making a mistake to leave me and she seems to finally realize that even if it's hard for her to admit it -- my story, she might tell you something different.
I reason myself to sleep when that happens. I tell myself I'm a good person and deserve good things. The 180, which took me three months before I was finally able to start pulling off, helped me detach.
Feeling that I can live a happy life with or without my wife helps me accept the stupid A and eventually get back to sleep. However much I hate the OM, I know my life will be better than his no matter what. He's a douchebag who invited destruction into his life, I'm not. We're also in the same industry. If we go ever go head-to-head on anything, I'll have a lot of rightous motivation to crush his ass. And I'll do that without ever doing anything that could land me in trouble. I don't need that and love my life (except for the A).
Me: BH
Her: WW
Together since 2001. Married since 2007. Found out about her affairs in 2013. Now separated, waiting for divorce paperwork and in a wonderful new relationship. Life is good again.
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