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Newest Member: Ehsteve

New Beginnings :
I'm happy for you dad...

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 Shockleader (original poster member #36827) posted at 7:29 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Yesterday, right after work I saw the name on my phone was from my DD, thought it would be concerning fathers day, but instead I was greeted with sobbing, sadness, and fear. Seems on the way back from a 7 hr drive with STBX, DD was threatened with being kicked out of the house for discussing with her grandma how STBX grew up, and other issues, no doubt related to her A.

STBX said that it was "throwing her under the bus"???, disrespectful, and since you seem to think I'm such a terrible person and parent, go live with your dad... Same ol crap as always.

So I calm her down, tell her if she needs a place she can stay with me, and to call me tomorrow when STBX is not around. She never did say "happy fathers day" to me.

So today she calls in much better spirits, tells me happy fathers day, and we discuss goings on. One topic I brought up sorta reluctantly, was my upcoming date. I was SO HAPPY to hear her say:

"I'm happy for you dad, and you did it right, not like mom".

Yep, that little bit of respect, "it's OK dad", and happiness for me really lifted my sails, and helps so much with healing.

Told DD I would talk to her soon, good luck with the summer job hunt, and I love you. One of the best days in a long time with my DD!

D-Day spring 2012
Me BS 53
Xcheater... Who cares.
One DD 25
Married 23 years
Divorced 12/23/13 Fu*king A!

The cruel, the unkind, those without honor, feast on the tender heart...

posts: 678   ·   registered: Sep. 13th, 2012
id 6377196
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 8:34 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Yay! Love happy endings.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6377305
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7yrsflushed ( member #32258) posted at 8:37 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Hi-Five!

D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

posts: 2231   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2011   ·   location: VA
id 6377313
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Crescita ( member #32616) posted at 8:40 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

So happy your daughter has and appreciates you. Her mom sounds like a piece of work.

“Happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue.” ― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

posts: 3640   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2011   ·   location: The Valley of the Sun
id 6377315
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wonderingbull ( member #14833) posted at 8:56 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Fistbump....

WB

The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time...

James Taylor

posts: 6054   ·   registered: Jun. 1st, 2007   ·   location: A better place
id 6377345
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 9:35 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

Yep, Dad you are doing it right and your DD realizes the difference from her Mom. You can't get much better than hearing those words from her.

Hugs

Gma

[This message edited by gma56 at 3:35 PM, June 17th (Monday)]

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 6377379
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 10:00 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6377406
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persevere ( member #31468) posted at 4:23 AM on Tuesday, June 18th, 2013

That's pretty great Shockleader - she's a smart kid. And many kids don't remember the holidays at the time - at least you connected with her, and it was a rather positive connection - winner, winner!

DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

posts: 5329   ·   registered: Mar. 9th, 2011
id 6377798
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better4me ( member #30341) posted at 5:16 AM on Tuesday, June 18th, 2013

The quote I used when I made my dad his card this year "Good fathers don't just say they love you. They show you."

You're doing well with that. Happy belated Father's Day!

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!

posts: 4246   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: Missouri
id 6377843
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 Shockleader (original poster member #36827) posted at 1:02 PM on Tuesday, June 18th, 2013

Thanks everyone for sharing this great moment with me!

D-Day spring 2012
Me BS 53
Xcheater... Who cares.
One DD 25
Married 23 years
Divorced 12/23/13 Fu*king A!

The cruel, the unkind, those without honor, feast on the tender heart...

posts: 678   ·   registered: Sep. 13th, 2012
id 6378003
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fraeuken ( member #30742) posted at 7:05 PM on Tuesday, June 18th, 2013

It is hard for them to admit but they seem to get it. Good for her

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

posts: 1334   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6378409
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Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 3:18 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

She knows which parent is the sane one.. and it isn't mom! Good for you..it is hard for DD's to let their first boyfriend (daddy) go. Good for you and for her.

K

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6379129
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 Shockleader (original poster member #36827) posted at 3:15 AM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

[This message edited by Shockleader at 6:39 AM, June 21st (Friday)]

D-Day spring 2012
Me BS 53
Xcheater... Who cares.
One DD 25
Married 23 years
Divorced 12/23/13 Fu*king A!

The cruel, the unkind, those without honor, feast on the tender heart...

posts: 678   ·   registered: Sep. 13th, 2012
id 6381894
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