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shudistayorgo (original poster new member #39674) posted at 6:25 AM on Saturday, June 29th, 2013
Dday was exactly 4 weeks ago. WH has been away this past week (just home today) from a business trip. We were supposed to do some reading and thinking.
The past month has been a roller coaster but I thought we were making some progress and the physical part of our relationship has been amazing. Well we got into arguing tonight and I told him if he was really going to be honest, I would need to have access to his phone and emails. So he gave me all the pass codes. When he went to bed, I checked the emails...nothing really there except for chats he had forwarded from a different account...
Then I went through his phone. He had taken her off of BBM but there was this other App on there called "Viber" that I hadn't heard of before. And there were chats from June 22 and again from today...as his plane was landing. And he signed it "LU"...aka "love you".
So of course I confronted him and freaked. I told him he needs to pack his shit in the morning and get out. Also out of rage I messaged OW's boyfriend on facebook and told him of the affair. And I texted her telling her she could have WH. And I also texted WH's best friend and cancelled for the weekend...explaining it was because his best friend was cheating on me with a 25year old co-worker.
I'm done.
avicarswife ( member #35799) posted at 6:47 AM on Saturday, June 29th, 2013
I'm so sorry.
Lots of hugs - keep posting so we can support you.
On D-day:BS 46 (me)WH 50
Toasted22M 26 yrs,3 kids (16-24) at discovery. D-Days 2012 23-24 May + TT D-Day 2013 12 Apr
mOW #1 EA yrs PA Feb 2009-end 2011
mOW #2 EA months PA 4 mths 2010
mOW#3 PA once
2022 Separated
Ladyogilvy ( member #31558) posted at 9:00 AM on Saturday, June 29th, 2013
Wow, I am so sorry you are going through this. I'm also really impressed with how you handled it. Whatever happens next... You did good!
Me: BW 57. Him: alcoholic, sober now, WH 65Married stopped counting after too many disappointing anniversaries. Two sons, 24&25 years old. He's still keeping secrets and only admits to what I have indisputable evidence of.
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 9:03 AM on Saturday, June 29th, 2013
Good for you for being so strong! How did he respond? Also, I think it's a good thing on a lot of levels that you told her bf. Don't ever give yourself a hard time about that. Sending hugs.
[This message edited by Jrazz at 3:04 AM, June 29th (Saturday)]
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
wannabenormal ( member #19772) posted at 9:24 AM on Saturday, June 29th, 2013
I know this is hard for you, but IMO - you have done exactly the right thing.
I think we BS' often think - we don't want to rock the boat or scare WS away...but we don't realize at the time is that often they're either in or out; so showing your WS *YOU* are out (in that you won't put up with this junk; it's not HIS choice) you did what was good for you, hard as it was.
Her BF also deserves to know.
We are here for you ((Shudi))
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