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Just so angry

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 PrincessPeach06 (original poster member #39588) posted at 1:42 AM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

I am just so angry at WS! He has been so wonderful and honest and supportive that I almost feel bad for it. I am happy that he instantly realized his mistake but I am so angry that he let it happen! He even admitted he could have stopped it but didn't. Now I can't stand watching movies or tv where people kiss/have sex even if its not an A because all I can think about is him kissing her. I didn't ask for this and it makes me so mad!!!!!!

Me (BS): 36
Him aka narcissistic psychopath (WS): 36
Married 17 years 6 kids ages 16-7
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

Filed for divorce 5/8/15

posts: 326   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013
id 6392159
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SisterMilkshake ( member #30024) posted at 2:28 AM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

(((PrincessPeach06)))

Totally understand all you are saying. Very normal for a BS going through this at this stage. You have a right to be angry! Don't stuff your feelings.

Your WS needs to know you are angry. It doesn't mean you have to rage at him, but you can tell him "I am feeling very angry at you!"

What else is your WH doing to help you feel safe and to show his remorse?

BW (me) & FWH both over half a century; married several decades; children
d-day 3/10; LTA (7 years?)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak." ~ Homer Simpson

posts: 15429   ·   registered: Nov. 5th, 2010   ·   location: The Great White North USA
id 6392182
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 PrincessPeach06 (original poster member #39588) posted at 5:43 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

He talks me with for hours everyday - he makes time for us to walk or drive or just sit on the couch with no distractions. He answers every question I have and holds me when I cry and apologizes over and over. We have gone to MC several times and he has started taking a look at his childhood and how it led him to become the selfish cold hearted man he was. He gave up his phone, emails, Facebook acct ect and basically never leaves my side except to work. Even there I can hang out with him a lot.

Yet I am still so mad!

Me (BS): 36
Him aka narcissistic psychopath (WS): 36
Married 17 years 6 kids ages 16-7
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

Filed for divorce 5/8/15

posts: 326   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013
id 6392608
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OnceInALifetime ( member #26023) posted at 7:23 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

Your D-day is very recent. If you weren't angry I'd be concerned you were just pushing it under the rug.

Limbo sucks, but it cannot be rushed, IMHO.

BH, now divorced

posts: 3529   ·   registered: Oct. 29th, 2009   ·   location: New England
id 6392691
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Ashland13 ( member #38378) posted at 7:46 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

I'm sorry, Peach.

I've had those same triggers for months and the visions in my mind have nearly driven me mad sometimes.

Happy Pants is still with OW in "this" case and it brings fresh tears to think of them off together while I am alone...and he still married and was all the while he knew her.

Yes, HP also mentioned something like that when dday was upon us, "It was supposed to be a fling that I didn't stop." That was one of the elements that pushed me to divorce.

I'm sorry again for your pain.

It's not something I've ever felt before, even with deaths and sickness.

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

posts: 3034   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: New England
id 6392711
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