SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

There is a lot that are deal breakers. Continued emotional abuse, the job, not being remorseful...to name a few.

It's not that this is making me want him. And I've really been feeling very good about myself. I have not been getting into anything with him. I barely speak to him. It's really the situation that makes me feel sad. Not him. I see him for what he is and I totally see through his BS.

Do you have a receipt for the ring. You can add it to your D documents - and ask for its value (original price - not what he gets for it, mind you.

But getting into any kind of conversation about it, or the money he gets for it, is feeding his need for attention and messing with your goal of detachment - so not worth it!

I just told him not to sell it. We will give it to someone to hold on to until the proper time comes.

I just told him not to sell it. We will give it to someone to hold on to until the proper time comes.

now promptly back to 180ing and detaching from him. He saw that taking the ring got a reaction from you and you talked to him. Don't be surprised if he pulls something like that again. If you have any valuables, heirlooms, or things you really love around the house that you WANT to keep you should box them up when he isn't around and give them to a friend or family member for safe keeping. He has alreayd shown that he will "Steal" from you. He will do it or something similar again if he thinks it will get your attention, get you to break the 180, or give him some feeling of control because as with the ring you had to ask him where it was and ask him not to sell it.

I'm starting to think I should just not talk to him at all. I'm not going to make spiteful decisions about the house, finances, or kids. I should just do what I want to do and not interact at all.

I'm starting to think I should just not talk to him at all. I'm not going to make spiteful decisions about the house, finances, or kids. I should just do what I want to do and not interact at all.

You do need to talk to him about kids and finances, but that can be very limited. Just the logistics.. Keep imagining a judge over your shoulder.. Sometimes doing this makes me paranoid, but it helps me get my head on straight when I'm letting my emotions take over and thinking with my heart instead of my head..

It's really the situation that makes me feel sad.

Yep, it's your hopes and dreams dying.. It sucks.. It can be confusing sometimes thinking you want him, but it's the fantasy you want. I know you know that.. Just gotta keep reminding yourself..

How did it go with the movie thing last night? How are you feeling today?

Oh, and he's going to make you feel like your decisions about the house, kids and finances are all spiteful. You are really in a no-win situation with him.. If you aren't doing anything and everything to make his life easier, he will make you feel like you are doing something wrong

I like to think of it like being a train. Full steam ahead of what I want to do. He's going to throw some bumps in the road, but I gotta keep moving forward.. I just recommend talking to an attorney so that you know legally what you should be doing so that your train is heading in the right direction. Once you hear from your attorney what you can and can't be doing, it will be easier to ignore what he thinks of what you're doing..

More hugs..