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Snapdragon ( member #4286) posted at 2:30 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
The wife/ex-wife/fiance/whatever is "crazy" because he CAUSED her to be crazy!! Sheesh.... we've seen that often enough amongst our own tribe here.
The funny thing is, the biggest red flag to me was that he told you he's a "great guy". Guys who say that are usually players in my book.
This. My fabulousness will be apparent to anyone within short order. I don't need to tell them that I am fabulous. Uh... unless I'm really not and just want them to think I am and buy into my ruse.
Divorced - recovered and hoping to help.
"We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again" ~Pink
persevere ( member #31468) posted at 4:46 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I enjoy hanging with my friends and having a few drinks. We are guilty of over doing it on occasion, but its a safe atmosphere, so no worries.
But, regardless of how it came to be, this guy is drama, and I would stay away from that if it were me. It's simply not worth the risk, esp for a party guy I've hooked up with once. There are too many other options to take that bet under the circumstances. Especially so close to home. Just my VHO.
((Hugs SSM))
DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
InnerLight ( member #19946) posted at 5:46 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
What was attractive about this guy? He seemed very ill behaved, with terrible boundaries and I'm puzzled as to why you would consider dating him even before finding out about the wife. I am glad you are stepping away now at least, but there were so many warning signs from the beginning. Stay safe!
BS, 64 yearsD-day 6-2-08D after 20 years together
The journey from Armageddon to Amazing Life happens one step at a time. Don't ever give up!
stronger08 ( member #16953) posted at 10:03 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Just my .02 cents here. But this guy seems to be a classic WS. I mean come on, how many times have we heard that the BS was crazy and jealous ? That's right out of the WS handbook. I'm almost positive that infidelity has been prevalent in his M. They are D for a reason after all. As for the neighbors. Who the hell knows what he is telling them about his W. Shit my XWW went around telling stories about me to people. And lots of them believed her. They very well may be fooled by his bullshit too. After all I've been through one thing is a given. If it looks like shit, smells like shit, its certainly shit. Be glad you did not step in it.
You cant eat soup with chopsticks.
stupidstupidme (original poster member #11888) posted at 3:00 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
lmao I totally agree. I don't know who did what to who, or why, or what is accurate. I don't even care... it's a shit show that I don't want to be involved in.
I have a feeling that he is doing things with the ex wife - trying to get back with her - and lying to his friends to sort of "save face" maybe. And of course, if he's a shit, he'll paint her out to be "crazy".
But won't he look like the fool if they reconcile. He will look like one, and SHE will be one... SHEESH 
Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength
August Wilson
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