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An unmarked package came today for WH. No return address, but signed for. Inside something he bought for her, no note, nothing to say who it was from.

Talk about ruining my day. They just won't f*ing go away! NC has been for ages, why send it now?

To his credit he told me what it was (I already knew about the purchase anyway).

Just f*ing pissed off, and trying not to take it out on him.

How have you guys handled similar?

I'm afraid bottling is going to lead to a blow up later.

Don't bottle it up, talk, talk & talk!

Turn towards each other, you can't control the OW

((((Shattered heart))))))

Yes, I can relate. Angry bird sent a magazine subscription for my h bday. At Christmas she sent a gift card. Always no return address or a made up one.

After 3 years. I'm learning that sometimes they want to cause trouble at home. Mind fu@king. Plain and simple.

You cannot control another person's actions. Only you control you. Talk it out with your H. Try to stay focused on what you want. Ignore her. What is he doing to help you through this assault?

Yep, happened to us on our vacation. We both moved away from the town the ow lives in, went back for a vacation and visiting family. OW sent ws a scathing email that she heard he was in town and did not contact her. It ruined my day, I was happy he told me and said he did not respond to her. Unfortunately he deleted the message. It has been 6 months since last contact.

I totally get how that can ruin a day. On a positive note, he was able to talk more about the A and apologise again. The fact that she did not get a response made me smile. This is the first time in 7 years that he has ignored her. Hang in there Shattered.

(((Shattered-Heart)))

The OW fished about 4 times. One as late as a year plus out from the A. We ignored. She went away when she found a new playmate.

That is what it is... fishing. Nothing more. Any type of validation/ attention, even negative attention gives her a hit/high. It is pathetic. Don't give it to her.

Burn her item, or toss it, put it on the neighbors dog... But stay NC.

It is a good sign that your H told the truth. Now you can deal with it like the team that you are. What is the plan if she decides to make follow-up contact with your H? How do you guys think it should be dealt with?

Perhaps you can have a strongly worded letter sent to her from a lawyer stating that if there is further contact you will be filing harassment charges.

It's okay to be mad. Even ticked off at your H. He invited her in without considering how it would all shake out. It is okay to be pissed.

But be pissed with a plan.

Hang in there.

My FWHs exOW/ coworker likes to brag about her new f buddies and show them off in front of him at work, as if to get a reaction out of him. He says shes not doing it to get his attention but when he broke it off with her, she had the nerve to repeatedly ask why and talk bad about him at work even though her and everyone else knew he was married. Its just the AP trying to get a reaction. Just dispose of the stuff and ignore her and any other future attempts. Good luck

the ow actually sent me an email a few months after everything blew up. attached to the email was a brochure on addiction...since she knows my h has substance abuse issues. she said she didnt mean to interfere, but couldnt help her self. i didnt respond. can you imagine the ow contacting me the wife to "help" me with my husband's addiction? what a serious loser.

i didnt respond. let her wonder all day "why" i didnt respond.

then a few days later...she sends an anonymous letter that included that same brochure printed out." she sent it to his job.

and this is the same woman who said she was so sorry for cheating with my husband....and how she would never contact him again. she knows i have access to his phone/phone records. so, she goes and sends him communications anonymously.

that is why i now clearly understand that it is never a good idea to contact the ow...they will always LIE.

as far as i know...my h has not contacted her either. i dont think he has...but since i dont trust him after all that happens...i cant say for sure. i guess as a BS, you just never really know anyway.