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WH Accusing Me of Being Unfaithful

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niaveone ( member #40317) posted at 6:50 PM on Friday, August 16th, 2013

RED FLAG!

My husband and I were together for 17 years, at what I *thought* was rock bottom and I asked for a divorce. I've never asked for one. Ever. He immediately jumped up and accused me of having an affair and swore he would find out who it was. He had NEVER accused me of that before. I now know he was right smack dab in the middle of his own physical and emotional affair, so it sickens me to no end to this day that he dared accuse me of doing it to him and getting so angry about it.

You need so start checking phone records and even hiring a PI to see what is going on.

Me: BS
Him: WS
Married: 24 years
2 children
2 DDays
Reconciling

posts: 511   ·   registered: Aug. 14th, 2013
id 6451217
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npain ( member #33539) posted at 8:33 PM on Friday, August 16th, 2013

Niaveone, his behavior SCREAMS that he is still cheating. Accusing you of cheating, along with a lot of the other behaviors that you have listed here shows that he has probably just taken things underground.

When I was doing in house separation (read in house hell), WH kept trying to hide everything--I told him, only someone who has things to hide will hide. Of course, I found out he had a LOT to hide and I kicked him out.

They project so much of their mess on us, because they have to try to justify their actions. But nothing ever justifies cheating and the betrayal that our spouses have dealt us.

Much hugs.

S, Filed 4/17/14--YAY, ME!!

posts: 515   ·   registered: Oct. 6th, 2011   ·   location: New York
id 6451384
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PrincessPeach06 ( member #39588) posted at 8:55 PM on Friday, August 16th, 2013

My H was controlling and possessive and I walked on eggshells for 16 years!

Now when I ask him why he was that way he says he was sure I was going to hurt him eventually and protecting himself. Yeah - someone who is afraid of being hurt goes out and hurts the person who loves them the most - makes TOTAL sense. *rolling eyes*

Me (BS): 36
Him aka narcissistic psychopath (WS): 36
Married 17 years 6 kids ages 16-7
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

Filed for divorce 5/8/15

posts: 326   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013
id 6451415
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