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New Beginnings :
Class Reunion Poll

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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 1:37 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

My 30th class reunion is this weekend. Even though I've attended all the previous ones, had a great time at each of them, and know plenty of friends who will be going, I've paid no attention to this one up until tonight, when my phone, FB, and email started blowing up with former classmates asking me if I'm coming.

*sigh*

Now I'm waffling back and forth - Go? Don't go? Show up at the casual Friday night event and ditch the dinner/dance on Saturday? Skip it all and spend the weekend recharging and catching up with my own life since I've been traveling the past two weeks?

For every pro, there's a con...

PRO: see old friends

CON: have to update old friends on the past several years (seems like it would be exhausting)

PRO: social time (one of my personal goals to stretch myself)

CON: giving up private time

PRO: It's in my hometown, so I can also spend time with my sister, nephews, and parents

CON: It's two hours from home, so I'd be cutting short my weekend errand time

PRO: Only happens every 10 years

CON: It's happening right now!

I could do this all night.

So, good people - what's your vote?

Go to it all

Go to just the casual Friday thing

Stay home and skip the whole thing

I'm in your hands. Be gentle with me.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

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id 6439087
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Amazonia ( member #32810) posted at 1:39 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

I would skip it, but I probably won't ever go to any of mine because there are about 3 people left from high school who I want to keep in touch with, and I'd rather just grab brunch with them when I'm already in town.

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

posts: 14469   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2011
id 6439092
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MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 1:42 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

Based on your past experiences, if I was you I'd go.

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6439098
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wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 2:20 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

I'm with Moo on this one, Empress.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

posts: 16592   ·   registered: May. 1st, 2006   ·   location: Somewhere
id 6439165
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 2:22 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

I agree with Moo and Nanners, I would go. You've enjoyed it in past and so you will this time. You're choosing if for just one event or the whole weekend. I doubt you will regret it.

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 6439171
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 3:50 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

Go on Friday. Then, decide if you want to go on Saturday. Like you said, it's only every 10 years and you had a great time last time. This is one of your current goals and you can catch up on weekend errands another day. There won't be another 30th reunion...

Who says you have to update everyone on your story?? Just give a quick version.

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5648   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 6439263
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 3:50 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

I can hardly argue with the collective wisdom of Moo, gma, and Princess Bananahammock.

I'll go. I'll commit to the Friday night casual thing, and then play it by ear from there.

Thanks, loves.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6439264
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 3:51 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

Cross-posted with you turtle - but we were on the same wavelength. Thanks, honey.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6439267
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persevere ( member #31468) posted at 6:41 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

I agree with the masses - try out Friday and gauge it from there.

DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

posts: 5329   ·   registered: Mar. 9th, 2011
id 6439411
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 10:36 AM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

Go. If anyone asks, you divorced him because you didn't like his girlfriend. It either elicits a laugh or shocked silence.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6439477
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homewrecked2011 ( member #34678) posted at 12:49 PM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

My opinion is from my Mom's life choices.

Mom says, "As you get older it is easy to just stay home. I make it a point to search out activites to go and to do. If I don't like something I can easily leave, but more often than not I really have a good time".

Who knows, you may meet someone who's husband has just left her for another woman and is devistated and needs SI!

Or you might have no drama for an entire evening! LOL

Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55

posts: 5513   ·   registered: Jan. 30th, 2012
id 6439522
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better4me ( member #30341) posted at 6:07 PM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

(and if you find yourself with nothing to do for a brief period of time on Saturday or Sunday...you call that SI friend of yours who happens to live in your home town, because you would just LOVE to see her)

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!

posts: 4246   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: Missouri
id 6440011
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 6:10 PM on Thursday, August 8th, 2013

b4me - I was actually just plotting out whether I could grab you for lunch on Saturday!!

So... is it a date?

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6440014
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Bobbi_sue ( member #10347) posted at 11:59 AM on Friday, August 9th, 2013

I would go. But then I like class reunions. Sounds like you sort of do too, at least have in the past.

It is easy (most of the time) IMO to change the subject. Just simply tell people you split with him and then talk about something else. Details not needed. I went to my 15th reunion soon after splitting with my XH. Had a good time and don't really recall talking about him much.

posts: 7283   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2006
id 6441130
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ninebark ( member #24534) posted at 3:39 PM on Friday, August 9th, 2013

I didn't got to my first class reunion becuase I didn't really want to see anyone from high school..lol.

I went to my second one and had a blast. I was surprised about how different my perception of myself in highschool was from everyone else.

I thought I was an outcast and a nerd, they say me a the really smart girl who got along with everyone. Who knew Did my self esteme wonders..lol

Have a great time at that reunion!

BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.

posts: 630   ·   registered: Jun. 23rd, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6441386
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ISPIFFD ( member #26367) posted at 7:28 PM on Friday, August 9th, 2013

I vote Go! My 35th reunion was last October. I was in town anyway because my dad had just passed so I'd moved back "home" months earlier to be with him. I had nothing going on but was busy wallowing and didn't want to have to explain everything.

One of my classmates wouldn't let me opt out. She picked me up, took me to every event (it was an all-weekend thing), and I had a blast! I'm so glad I went, it was definitely what I needed and a lot of fun. As a result, some of us got together again this past April because the reunion had been so much fun.

So I think you should Go

I'm done here; sick of 2 x 4s

posts: 2057   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2009
id 6441696
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 11:29 PM on Sunday, August 11th, 2013

So, I went on Friday night. And I had a blast! Stayed out way too late, talked myself hoarse, and laughed more than I have in ages.

At one point, I found myself at a table with 4 other divorced classmates, each of whom had been a BS. DDay stories were traded, iTips shared, and new beginnings celebrated.

I came home the next afternoon to support a friend who is going through a D (not infidelity related), but first lingered long enough to share a delightful lunch with better4me. So good to catch up and chat.

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 5:29 PM, August 11th (Sunday)]

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6444025
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MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 1:47 AM on Monday, August 12th, 2013

I'm glad that it wasa blast

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6444181
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 7:00 PM on Monday, August 12th, 2013

Yay! I'm glad you went and had a good time.

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5648   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 6445086
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 9:11 PM on Monday, August 12th, 2013

And now everyone's posting pictures, both from this weekend AND from way WAY back in the day.

Lordy - nothing more aging than seeing so many pictures of yourself when you were young.

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 3:13 PM, August 12th (Monday)]

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6445304
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