SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I have looked at his website. I don't know where to start. There is a lot to purchase on there to get started.

Has anyone used this method? We are breaking even most months or worse. I need a plan. Looking for structured help. I am good with numbers but we are starting to sink. We have a savings and charge card if need be but it seems like we can no longer handle the extra expenses every month such as this month was my sons birthday and back to school shopping.

I love listening to Dave Ramsey on the radio. His show is syndicated so maybe you can catch it where you live.

His approach makes sense and I often keep his advice in mind when making financial decisions. As far as his classes go, though, I can't help you there. Haven't taken any of them.

Good luck to you.

Try reading his book first, Total Money Makeover. You should be able to find it in the library. There is a lot of stuff offered, but you can follow his system without spending any $$$

This is going to sound wonkers but have you checked out Dr. Phil's site for financial ideas?

He's got practical and down to earth (and yes...mentally painful) advice. And he doesn't ask you to purchase anything......

k9

thanks K9, I will check it out.

I did the Financial Peace University -- $100 at a local church. They usually purchase 1 or 2 extra to let someone in who needs it. In my case they let me pay $10.00 each week.

IF my wh and I had reconciled, I would make this a requirement because we had huge $$ issues for one thing.

The first few lessons were excellent. After that, however, they went into investing,etc. It was too much info for those of us just trying to get started.

Best thing I liked was:

1 day a week you sit down with your spouse to plan the week. I heard him on the radio one day that 1 mule can pull lets say 500 lbs alone and when you put two mules together you think they could pull 1000 lbs, but actually together they pull 1500 lbs. (my figures could be wrong, but you get the idea). The couple who pulls together can accomplish so much more. The program is about basic communication, about giving, about taking, about working together as a team to realize your dreams.

When you take the course, it is on videos, so if you can purchase the videos online somewhere that would be ok prob, but I think many couples got alot out of being in the room with other couples with the same questions, encouraging each other, etc.

BTW you don't have to say anything personal. During the course, but it is nice when different couples report having reached goals...

I would recommend bc I think it's good for the marriage/family and Dave Ramsey is hilarious! He's been where you are financially.

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 2:49 PM, August 24th (Saturday)]

Years ago I read his book from the library and was able to take away everything I/we needed.

We read his book "Total Money Makeover" without taking the course which was being offered through our church.

Main points are:

Budget for EVERYTHING.

Pay off smallest bills first (sense of accomplishment).

No vacations/new purchase UNTIL bills are paid off(from what I remember).

ALL extra monies go towards bills!

No credit cards.

Save cash for what you want; no borrowing.

H and I sit down at the first of each month and go over our budget for the month. We put everything we can think of into it. We reserve a set amount for fun in cash and when that's gone we quit going out until next month. No using credit cards! We just bought a new truck for my husband with cash we saved. His last truck was 19 years old. We owe nothing except our mortgage and we are working on paying that off.

It's an awesome plan.

It's truly total FREEDOM.

I HIGHLY recommend it!

[This message edited by Rollercoaster at 6:18 PM, August 24th (Saturday)]

There's a website called I Heart Radio that let's you listen to radio stations. There is a Dave Ramsey channel. Check it out. I think his advice is spot-on.

I'm going to check this out for myself. I've been trying to save up for a new car. Mine is 15 years old and I don't know how much longer it will last. I already have almost 170,000 miles on it.

I break even most months. I've been picking up extra hours when I can and have been putting that back. Something else I've been trying to is save my tax refunds instead of spending it.

Also if you pay for the course (100.00 and classes are offered at churches usually), you get a certificate and anytime anywhere you can take the course again for free -- for the rest of your life!

Again, in the class no one discusses their actual $$ amount of anything, we just talk about goals met, challenges, etc.

Also, the class was at a church but many people in our class didn't go to church, and they didn't even talk about us going to their church (probably a condition of his).

There were 12 couples in the class I attended -- all types of people in there.

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 4:50 AM, August 25th (Sunday)]

We did the Dave Ramsey plan by buying the Total Money Makeover book which we could have checked out from the library for free...and we made it through step 5 of the plan. We didn't join any groups or go to any events. You shouldn't have to worry about all the extras when you are already strapped. If you are really ready then you can do it.

The basics are pretty, well... basic.

Paying off the smallest debt first is key. Then 'snowball' that payment you were devoting to that debt to the next debt, plus whatever you can afford to throw at it.

It's essential to draw up a budget and figure out how much you bring in and where you allocate that money. If you spend more than you make, try to find a way to make more income or cut spending.

Write EVERYTHING down, especially cash spending. That's the biggest leak in most people's pockets.

There's a Canadian show called "Til Debt Do Us Part" with Gail Van Oxslade. She's no-holds-barred. Goes in and prints out an assessment of what a couple is spending and tells them stuff like "If you keep this up you'll be a million dollars in debt in five years".

She's awesome.

We bought a house just before DDay and were into a line of credit for renos. I spent the next couple of years doing the credit card dance with x paying his rent plus half the mortgage and bills until I managed to sell it and clear everything off in the divorce.

Never want to go back there again. It was not fun.

I allocate a budget line for 'fun' and keep a tally as well. When I'm up to the line I stay home.

[This message edited by FaithFool at 11:08 AM, August 25th (Sunday)]

Love love love Dave Ramsey. I have his Total Money Makeover book on my dresser right now. I'm re-reading it now that I'm President, CEO, and CFO of my home. There's also a cool blog I read called Mr Money Moustache. What hit me about his blog was a story he told. He was at a friend's house. Friend's wife was working a second job to pay off debt. Friend's wife walked in the door from work with a bottle of wine and a DVD. MMM said that she wasn't working a second job to pay off debt. She's working a second job to buy movies and drink expensive beverages. That made me rethink all my "necessities". Dave Ramsey says the same thing in his "live like no one else" but, the way MMM said it struck a cord with me.

I have to admit, I am still struggling with "wine is a luxury". I may have to move it back into the necessity category, maybe under mental health.

I have to admit, I am still struggling with "wine is a luxury". I may have to move it back into the necessity category, maybe under mental health.

I like how you roll.

If you can rejig the budget to make it work, then no harm done. Personally I think it's cheaper than therapy.... hell, it IS therapy.

[This message edited by FaithFool at 1:42 PM, August 25th (Sunday)]

We read Dave Ramsey's book and we used his budgeting guide as a jumping off point for our household budget when we were first married.

- You can easily work his program for free. All of his budget forms and ideas, organization plans and priority lists, a description of how to pay off debt "debt snowball" and the importance of an emergency fund are all available in his book and online for free.

- We already both had pretty good budgets before we married, but with child support and insurance combinations, our joint budget was more complicated than our previous single-person budgets. So Dave's plan was helpful here. I can't recall if it's in his podcasts or his books, but he's pretty realistic about couples both compromising and working together. But the rules apply across the board: no new debt, pay yourself first, live below your means, pay everything off and be financially free and smart.

- Things we would never have done had it not been for reading Dave Ramsey: Getting the right amount of life insurance!! Term life insurance, 10x each of our annual salaries. Also: making a file that contained our living wills, our regular wills, all the details of our life insurance and finances in black and white, our various legal documents and some key locations and passwords. All safely in our deposit box with instructions.

- Things we completely disagree with Dave about: well, one thing mainly - selling any car you can't immediately pay off and buying a "good, cheap" car with cash instead. We tried doing that with the one car we had that was not paid off, and it was a disaster. The cheap used car tested out just fine with the mechanic, but within 6 months started accruing issues and problems that made it unsafe to drive. We poured more money into that car than we would have made payments on the car we sold. It was a false economy. And the stress of never knowing if the cheap-mobile was going to start, or could make it on a weekend apple picking drive - way too much stress and way too many mechanic bills and bitten fingernails. We bought a 3 year old certified car instead, paid it off within a year and have never put a dime into it outside of regular maintenance. But that's just us. We do a lot of driving and have 3 kids at various times needing rides.

I have tried many times, but DH will not stick with it with me. And when i put my foot down he pulls his whole "i hate asking for my own money' crap.

We are living hand to mouth still, we have no savings at all...its depressing.