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Too_Trusting (original poster member #99) posted at 12:33 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
Saw this today and felt like it perfectly sums up why sorry just isn't enough in infidelity:
"Anyone perfect must be lying; anything easy has its cost. Anyone plain can be lovely; anyone loved can be lost." Barenaked Ladies
simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 12:38 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
This is perfect!
In my opinion when they say "for what it's worth" before the sorry just demeans it even more.
Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)
AStar ( member #39971) posted at 12:38 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
I understand this perfectly. Sorry, remorse or being absolutely perfect H after an EA is not enough for me.
It can not be fixed - ever. Scars remain. So no thanks, I have difficulty even trying to fix something I didnt break.
Me BS (41)
Him WH (45). EA and possible PA (denied)
D Day 7/21/2013
M 8 years - filing for D
**The cruelest lies are often told in silence- Robert Louis Stevenson
olwen ( member #39759) posted at 1:54 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
I saw this on facebook a few weeks ago and showed it to H as it expressed my feelings on the matter exactly.
He paused for a minute looking sad and said "that's so true, I get what you're saying - but isn't it my job to get the superglue and try to mend it as best I can?"
I was pretty touched by that but also saddened that we have to mend the broken plate in the first place.
Too_Trusting (original poster member #99) posted at 3:15 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
olwen, your WS has the right idea. I posted this because many WS (mine included 
) reach for the "sorry card" and think that will make it better.
Once you have shattered someone's heart and trust into a million pieces, sorry doesn't mean a thing without that GLUE.
"Anyone perfect must be lying; anything easy has its cost. Anyone plain can be lovely; anyone loved can be lost." Barenaked Ladies
cancuncrushed ( member #28156) posted at 6:42 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
This was probably silly, but it really came from my heart. I told my H to never, ever, apologize again. Ever. The word sorry, means nothing, and he seemed to be so free afterward. It makes me violent. 
crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 6:55 PM on Monday, August 26th, 2013
I feel the same way and my WH has said it a million different ways. I know that must be frustrating for him too. 
I always thought I hated the vase idea because I didn't want there to be cracks
So I am trying to look at this like a bone that breaks. When it grows back, it grows back even stronger. 
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
RedRose ( member #39584) posted at 3:36 AM on Tuesday, August 27th, 2013
I love this quote!
Olwen, it sounds like your H really gets it!
It is really frustrating to hear "sorry" all the time but not have him really get it.
BW-37
WH - 38
2.5 year LTA
2nd A 2/20/16
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