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Phoenix9572 (original poster member #39987) posted at 6:31 PM on Thursday, August 29th, 2013
So earlier this week I caught my WH soliciting call girls and kicked him out. We have been dealing off and on with him on web-sites for the last 3 months as well as texting a female "friend/client" that he swears was nothing. Yeah right.
I've been monitoring his texts and I can read most of them - he does not know. He texted client/ho-bag and told her he would love to talk. We are divorcing - long over due. Packed and out of the house and lawyers are talking. Then this morning he's asking what she's doing after work tonight?
We haven't even freakin filed papers yet! I really thought that kicking him out would be a wake up call to him but obviously he does not realize that he has a problem. Our therapist believes that he has SA but has not come to the realization that he needs help.
I want so bad to text this "friend" and make sure that she truely understands both sides of this story. Somebody tell me that's a bad idea.
Me - 40
WH - 42
Married 18 years
kids - 14, 12
DD - May 13, 2013
DD2 - Aug 4, 2013
DD3 - Aug 27, 2013
Status - Legally separated; really wanted R but don't think that is possible anymore
undonelife ( member #38421) posted at 6:50 PM on Thursday, August 29th, 2013
Its a bad idea. He can then say you are his crazy wife and that is why he is "getting away from you", even though you kicked him out. It will help him self-justify his actions and probably garner sympathy from this new woman.
Me: BS 59 Him: WH 57
M: 34 years
DDay 1 1986 EA Confessed,Rugswept
DDay 2 11/25/2012 EA/PA Caught
TT 9/9/13 Lies,Pictures
OW:20 yrs younger M-CwOW
1ost0ne ( member #40202) posted at 8:55 PM on Thursday, August 29th, 2013
Bad idea. You are divorcing so it would be in your best interest and health to let it go. Him, the Hos, his texts, everything. He continuing to hurt you and if you keep looking, all you will find is more pain.
Get out and make your new life. Be a Phoenix!
“The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”
― Maya Angelou
Phoenix9572 (original poster member #39987) posted at 3:44 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Thanks. I stepped away from the ledge. I had IC tonight too and that helped a lot.
You just get so angry you want to lash out any way possible. KWIM?
Me - 40
WH - 42
Married 18 years
kids - 14, 12
DD - May 13, 2013
DD2 - Aug 4, 2013
DD3 - Aug 27, 2013
Status - Legally separated; really wanted R but don't think that is possible anymore
AppleBlossom ( member #38541) posted at 4:09 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Yes, I do know what you mean, but it is pretty much a given that you will probably regret it. Take that anger and that energy and focus on you.
Warninglight ( new member #40507) posted at 12:36 AM on Saturday, August 31st, 2013
OP. love you reaction and not taking it. Vows mean something.
WIfe email EA. DDay 03-0-2013 758A OM was a half literate hillbilly ex.
dontknowwhyme ( member #21587) posted at 2:28 PM on Saturday, August 31st, 2013
I'm glad you did not contact her. From what I've seen it is never helpful and usually only causes you more pain for yourself.
His actions only strengthen the idea you are making the right decision.
[This message edited by dontknowwhyme at 8:28 AM, August 31st (Saturday)]
BS 38
FWW 37 (fireandice)
Married 13 Years - Together 20
D-Day1:Jan 08 (EA OM#1)
D-Day2:8-15-08 (EA/PA OM#2)
DS12, DS9
D-Day3:11-3-10
Divorced 1-27-11
Remember, you don't drown from being thrown in the water. You drown from staying in it.
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