my H's A was with his ex girlfriend. When I found this out I was really shocked by the whole thing.
For like 13 years her name was never mentioned and I didn't even think he thought about her. Then here he was writing love letters how he never stopped loving her etc and how he always thought of her..etc
With me, I had plenty of ex's too. But, the thing is, I never even think of them at all. One guy I was with for 4 years and another guy I was with for 2. But, I never think of them since I married. I have never had any urge to contact them ever. I never desire them. If they contacted me I wouldn't even call/email etc them back.
Do you still desire your old loves? Think of them/ Love them?
One thing I was thinking today is about fantasy life. I think music can play into fantasy. You know when you listen to songs on the radio and its all songs like..."ohhh I will love you forever...blah blah or love you even when you are gone etc...'
I know that one Adele song is like this about a woman who contacts her old flame. I am sure you might know the one I mean.... "Someone like You" where she says in it : "I heard that you're settled down/That you found a girl and you're married now. I heard that your dreams came true/Guess she gave you things I couldn't give to you". She even said in an interview that it was about angrily confronting her ex when he married someone else and how she imagined him when he would be 40 and she would contact him again.
: "Adele had said that she began writing it on her acoustic guitar in the wake of the break-up of her 18-month relationship with the 30-year old man she thought she would marry. A few months after their split he was engaged to someone else. "We were so intense I thought we would get married. But that was something he never wanted... So when I found out he does want that with someone else, it was just the horrible-est feeling ever."
Well the crazy thing is, this song is like my life. See, the ex and my H were like this for about 18mons and then one day, they broke up and he moved on. He met me and within a few months we were married. He chose me.
So my H's ex was fuming that he married someone else and not her. That is her motivation she said for contacting H. To get back at him, to hurt me, to win him back.
I liked that song when it came on in 2011 but it always irked me. I did think about my H's ex girlfriend when this song came out...ironically when this song was popular would have been prime time in their secret A. I often wonder if this song played into her contacting my H. Its a song that really sucks when you think about it--a woman trying to mess up a married man's life.
I would never do that to any of my ex's. We had intense relationships too but, we broke up. We moved on. I don't love them anymore nor desire them to love me. I did love them at the time, but that love just ended one day because I chose it to. I would never even say to them "I love you as a friend". I did then, but don't now. They don't always have to be my friend or my love forever or any of that crap. All of my loyalty and love and friendship belongs to my H. I just wish my H would feel the same.
I don't get ppl that want to rekindle lost love. Am I heartless or something? Am I the only one that thinks this ?