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Newest Member: Thirteenthstepped

Reconciliation :
Mixed Emotions

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 AFrayedKnot (original poster member #36622) posted at 2:26 PM on Wednesday, September 4th, 2013

So today is DS3 first day at preschool. I have mixed emotions. He was kind of a security blanket for me. My SAHM fWS was with him all day. Now she has a lot more free time. My anxiety is bubbling up.

I know logically that if she wanted to cheat nothing including DS3 would stop her.

Then on the other hand I am so excited my boy is going to school. He is going to have so much fun and meet new friends.

New patterns New routines New trust New growth for all of us.

BS 48fWS 44 (SurprisinglyOkay)DsD DSA whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better."Knowing is half the battle"

posts: 2859   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2012
id 6473615
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TxsT ( member #39996) posted at 2:30 PM on Wednesday, September 4th, 2013

Chico.....

Take a deep breath and just for once believe that you and she are alright....and you will be from here on out. Your actions come from what you believe.....you have inspired me and so many other people. Today is my turn to pick you up and show you how wonderful life can be even after an A.

It was so long ago that my youngest started school. I remember the fun atmosphere, the apprehension and then elation later in the day....enjoy it!

T

Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!

posts: 605   ·   registered: Jul. 24th, 2013   ·   location: CDN
id 6473622
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LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 3:05 PM on Wednesday, September 4th, 2013

Chicho - Congrats on the young one going into his first day of preschool! Those are fun times. My son is 9 1/2 now, and he still remembers all of his friends and teachers from preschool.

One thing that has helped us when Amerasia was at home, and I was at work, is exchanging an email or text or two throughout the day, just letting each other know what we've been up to, and how our day is going.

I hope your son has an awesome time!!

posts: 31109   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 6473662
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Simple ( member #18814) posted at 10:08 PM on Wednesday, September 4th, 2013

Congrats with preschool!

Mixed emotions are normal. Again, don't have to bottle that up. You can talk to your FWS about it but at the same time not make it seem like you're harping on the past. My husband and I have key words and whenever I need some reassurance because I'm having mixed emotions or triggers, he hugs me and tells me what I need to hear. There are times when he even recites what he's done so that I focus on the facts, the actions and not the random emotions I'm feeling. Somehow we've managed to do it without FWS feeling like I would never trust him or would never believe what I see with my own eyes.

Five year R here so I do know that in true R it does get better.

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

-October 3, 2007
-February 18, 2022

posts: 946   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2008
id 6474272
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