This Topic is Archived
Rebreather ( member #30817) posted at 6:29 PM on Thursday, September 19th, 2013
PJL, just wanted to give you a hug and a high five for staying true to yourself. Maybe this is the REAL wake up call he needs so he can take real action. I will hope so!!
Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Rec'd.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi
dameia ( member #36072) posted at 1:55 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
I know I'm late to this, but I just wanted to give you a hug..
(((PinkJeepLady)))
I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. I think everyone else gave you some excellent points to ponder. I don't know where you'll go from here, but I hope your WH will make the decision to truly change this time.
Me: BS
D-Day: 7/7/12
Trust is like paper. Once it's crumpled it can never be perfect again.
PinkJeepLady (original poster member #37575) posted at 3:25 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Never too late for a hug, in fact I needed one this morning. The shock is wearing off and now I feel confused and frozen. WH made a tremondous effort yesterday, but I don't know. This is so hard!
Pondering can really wear you out. I am wondering how I can put my full efforts into R while also being cautiously optimistic about WH's actions? How do I do that?
The support from SI has felt like a cushion that broke a bad fall, so nice!
Me: BW Him: FWH
DDay June 1st 2012
cheated with prostitutes overseas
Reconciled - thought so, but now divorcing
ISPIFFD ( member #26367) posted at 5:18 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
You find the note on the floor, by the trash? Sounds like a manipulation to me.
^^^ This. Exactly what I was thinking when I read your original post. I have no doubt that he meant for you to find that folded up postit. If he didn't want you to find it, he would've made damn sure it was buried in the trash or burned or thrown in the ocean. My XH used to do this. I'm amazed in retrospect by how many times I found things until someone pointed out to me that if my XH didn't actually want me to find them (and be horribly hurt all over again each time), he would have actually taken the trouble to get rid of them.
((((PinkJeepLady))))
I'm done here; sick of 2 x 4s
PinkJeepLady (original poster member #37575) posted at 6:31 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
That's what is so great here, other people validate what you are thinking!
We aren't super clean but we don't leave trash on the floor. It was almost like he straight out handed it to me, how insane is that??!! He actually is considering this himself and I will say we are talking about things we haven't previously been able to. He seems to be very clear and driven today to get help and stick with it. I never felt he was completely out of the "fog", but I seems like it's more likely today.
Appreciate your thoughts, makes me not feel so crazy!
Me: BW Him: FWH
DDay June 1st 2012
cheated with prostitutes overseas
Reconciled - thought so, but now divorcing
This Topic is Archived
