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The day after my last physical (ladies, you know the one) was the day I started my PA. One of the things my BH asked of me (post-DDay, firmly in R) was to get checked each year. (I usually avoid physicals, probably FOO issue.) It's been 14 months since that exam and 13 months since DDay. I have an appointment this afternoon. I have no reason to believe that AP gave me any physical maladies, but I'm feeling anxious about this exam anyway. Also, we moved to another country about 9 months after DDay. The good news is that we don't worry about bumping into AP and the location triggers aren't here. However, I'm seeing a doctor (a new one, of course) who speaks pretty good English, but it's not his first language. Oh, and he's a guy; I've been reassured that there will be a nurse present. I know better than to expect any sympathy for my nervousness about this visit from my BH; I am wondering how other WS (WW especially) have weathered this one.

That seems pretty rambling. Let me sum up:

Never been checked for STDs before; never needed to be.

Never tolerated physical exams; avoided whenever possible.

Uncomfortable about doctor: a man poking around down there, English not his first language, not sure what to expect.

BH asked me to do this for him. Not expecting sympathy; I brought this on myself and him and us.

Physical reminder of A (for which I am eternally remorseful and ashamed).

Thank you.

P.S. Why is there a stop sign? I'm still learning about the icons.

[This message edited by Neznayou at 1:02 AM, September 23rd (Monday)]

Neznayou,

The Stop is the default when posting in the Wayward Forum. When it is on, no Betrayed Spouses can respond. You need to uncheck it if you want to hear from Betrayed Spouses when you start your post.

If you don't want it, I can ask one of the Administrators to remove it for you

I have no reason to believe that AP gave me any physical maladies

We'd love to think so, but you never really know a person.

Is there a way to get a female doctor as opposed to a male? Maybe that'll help with the anxiety little?

I'm not a huge fan of exams. Never was. It's invasive, uncomfortable and in my case, painful. I've tried to trick my brain and say, "Well the doctor sees thousands of women a year. It's no big deal. It's the best for my health. Blah, blah, blah." But when I walk in a room and see those stupid stirrups, yeah, the brain tricking goes out the window. At that point, I just grit my teeth and cringe till it's over.

I can't comment on the STD testing as my As were emotional. Maybe someone else can chime in on that.

At any rate, good luck at your doctor visit.

[This message edited by Aubrie84 at 9:17 AM, September 23rd (Monday)]