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headdesk ( member #40787) posted at 6:44 PM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
Yes, as many others have said, it is 100% rape. I was in a similar relationship in my late teens - same thing. Took me years to finally admit that it was rape. The physical/emotional abuse were easier to admit.
Have been in counseling for it since - in Canada they do not report it unless it involves a minor that could still be exposed to danger, or if they feel that you're in direct danger yourself.
Please keep in mind that the 'boogy man jumping out of the bushes' rape is actually pretty unusual. Most women are raped the way you and I were. You are also very not alone...1 in 3 to 1 in 2 women have been sexually assaulted during their lifetimes. This isn't your shame to bear at ALL. This is something that was done to you and is HIS shame.
Me: 39
WH: 42
DDay:Sep 19 2013 (only TT of EA)
Oct 4th 2013 revealed PA through snooping.
Marred 16 years, together for 20. Looking to R at this time. We have awesome kids (12/14).
Softcentre ( member #39166) posted at 7:00 PM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
Sorceress, I'm in the UK too. They would only inform the police for child protection issues or murder, not for rape or sexual assault. I have discussed a sexual assault (not by WH)with my IC and she was not duty bound to report it. You can also discuss it as a hypothetical case or refuse to reveal the name of the person who did it to you, if you wish to protect yourself further.
Me: BW
Him: XWH
2 Children
Finally reached indifference & looking forward to my new beginning
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