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Guttedagain (original poster member #39126) posted at 5:29 PM on Wednesday, October 2nd, 2013
H got the christmas party invite email from the office down south. This is where he got together with the ow1 who works down there. He declined the invite but i feel so pissed thinking what he was up to in the past, especially when the reply came back about him being life and soul of the party. It's as if reality has hit, the reality that it happened, he did what he did and there really is no escape from it ever. My H has been trying and we do have good days but the bad days are bad, mostly caused by triggers and it feels like 1 step forward, 2 back. Tonight, no doubt will be another exhausting night spent talking through the trigger, communicating, but nothing really makes the hurt go away it simply subsides for a while. X
BS me 46WS him 49Married almost 25 yrs, together almost 302 DD 18 & 13Dday #1 14/4/13 TT until Dday #2 28/4/13Living one day at a time
strongerdaybyday ( member #40264) posted at 6:49 PM on Wednesday, October 2nd, 2013
I know how you feel. Triggers are the absolute worst. Just when I feel sane again...WHAM...trigger. Then hurt and pain. (((HUGS)))
Me-BW Him - WH
Married 6 years, together 15 years
3 awesome and beautiful children
OC discovered on Dday - born in 2005
D-Day Summer 2013
working towards D...I can't pretend anymore
**If I edit I'm correcting a typo!**
Getting to Happy ( member #35200) posted at 1:40 AM on Thursday, October 3rd, 2013
Triggers!!!UGH! 
I am so sorry that you have to go through this shit storm!
Just know that you have to go through it...not around it.
And I promise as you process your new reality...'Your husband had a GIRLFRIEND!'... will get better. *Better* maybe be a bit optimistic...you won't flinch as much.
Time will make the difference.
If all goes well with your R the two of you,as a loving couple, will be able to put this nasty business behind you.
Take care. 
WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...
Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown
gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 2:10 AM on Thursday, October 3rd, 2013
Triggers suck.
Just hold on to the fact that he is NOT going this year.....
(unless, of course, he begins acting as if he's doing you some big favor by declining the invitation...)
"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott
In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.
Guttedagain (original poster member #39126) posted at 10:22 AM on Sunday, October 6th, 2013
Thanks, i know everyone here has or is going through the same. It's helps to feel I'm not alone.
BS me 46WS him 49Married almost 25 yrs, together almost 302 DD 18 & 13Dday #1 14/4/13 TT until Dday #2 28/4/13Living one day at a time
topperoff22 ( member #40762) posted at 3:04 PM on Sunday, October 6th, 2013
So there right now. It feels like it will never get better...never.
BS - Me 36
WS - Him 35 (almost 36)
Child: son, 6; just learned one on way
DDAY - July 24, 2013 (thousands spent on ex girlfriend)
DDAY2 -Aug. 3, 2013 (proof he slept with her)
R is slow going after TT for 1 month
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