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hummingbird8 ( member #25086) posted at 9:35 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2013
You have boundaries and so do they. They are telling you they don't want you staying with SO while you are living with and being supported by them.
You may not like what they say but unless you are willing to move out I don't think you have much choice.
Their house their rules. It's a respect thing. If they are being nice enough to help you and the kids out you should respect their boundaries.
Missymomma ( member #36988) posted at 10:55 PM on Tuesday, October 8th, 2013
It sounds like your parents have no boundaries and violate yours. These were issues I dealt with regarding my mother in my early 20s. It just isn't really their right to tell you what to do with your life, just as it isn't your right to tell them what to do with theirs. Very gently, you ended up in an abusive relationship because you are so used to your family violating your boundaries that it doesn't feel uncomfortable for you. Hopefully, therapy will help and you will be able to clearly define yourself to your parents.
People that violate others boundaries absolutely flip out when they start standing up for themselves. So, your parents will probably ask you to move out once you stand up to them. Not to worry, this is all part of the process. Continue to hold your ground and move out. Eventually, with continued boundaries they will eventually learn to respect you. My mother certainly has great respect for me now.
DDay - 6/15/11
R started - 7/1/11
False Discl- 9/27/12
Real Discl - 2/12/13
Poly - 3/1/13 Pass!
Me - BS (46)
WH - 52 (SA, NA, WA)
Kids: 2 littles and 1 grown
The road to recovery is long and hard. Some days I am up for it and others not!
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