SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I'm suffering from depression and I've found that specially when my kids are gone that if I listen to certain songs they trigger a really horrible downward spiral. Today I realized I really need to keep a "safe" playlist ready for when my mood gets dark.

Some examples:

Safe songs:

Will.i.am and Justin Beiber- power

Call me maybe (Carly Rae jespen)

NOT safe songs:

Flood by jars of clay

Damaged by plumb

Cut by plumb

Real by plumb

Beautiful by Bruno Mars

Teenage dream by Katy perry

Music is so closely tied to our emotions. I can understand exactly why you would want to have a safe play list.

So a question? What makes a song safe or unsafe for you? Lyrics? Specific ties to people or experiences in your past? Specific groups?

(((((courageous))))

So a question? What makes a song safe or unsafe for you? Lyrics? Specific ties to people or experiences in your past? Specific groups?

That's a good question or I guess I should say questions.

The weird thing is normally a song on a good day has no effect on me but on a slightly bad day if I listen to the same song it causes a downward spiral.

I love flood by jars of clay... My son use to listen to it all the time.... It's basically a song about Noah's ark. Well if you remember about a month ago I got drunk and hit rock bottom.... This was the song that set me off. A part of the lyrics are:

" my mind is crushed by the thrashing waves

Lift me up so high that I cannot fall

Lift me up - when I'm falling

Lift me up - I'm weak and I'm dying

Lift me up - I need you to hold me

Lift me up - Keep me from drowning again

Downpour on my soul

Splashing in the ocean, I'm losing control

I can't feel my feet touching the ground"

I bolded the words that just played in my head because that was what I was feeling like.

The justin Beiber and will.i.am song is safe because the words in it talks about being alive and what doesn't kills us makes us stronger.

Lyrics hit me really hard. I listen to them. If you ever heard the plumb songs (my SO got me hooked on her)

her song cut is about a cutter, damaged is about a woman talking about her innocence taken away as a child from sexual abuse, and real is about a women begging to have value and get attention.

I do have songs associated with people too. Call me maybe is tied to SO I love pink but some of her recent songs are too closely tied to infidelity that I can't handle it any more. Blake Shelton is associated with false R. Rihanna we found love in a hopeless place is a song connected to the A.

I love nickleback. Never going to be alone is SO's ringtone.... Just a side note grenade is exwh's ringtone

Edited to correct spelling.

[This message edited by courageous at 7:58 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]

How about Brave by Sara Bareilles or Roar by Katy Perry? They're both upbeat, positive songs (to me).

I also like OneRepublic. Feel Again and Counting Stars always get turned up when I hear them on the radio in the car.

Stronger by Kelly Clarkson

Jump by Van Halen always lifts me up

Make it Mine by Jason Mraz

I second "Feel Again" by One Republic. That song instantly puts me a good mood. But the lyrics may be triggery for some.

My other feel good song lately has been "Classic" by MKTO. Upbeat pop song...lyrics should be safe.

I listened to barge and think that will trigger me. I love roar and totally forgot about it! Thanks! the one republic songs were good. I will listen to the rest next. Thanks for your help. Stronger was great during my divorce but I can't listen to it any more

For the past four or five years now I have made a mix tape/cd for Valentine's Day for no one in particular (kinda) just to sort of remind myself of value the relationships (with God, family, friends, non-friends) I have, have had, and have yet. Because of this I have come across a lot of music I wouldn't normally.

1) Bloom by Paper Kites (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8inJtTG_DuU)

2) Sweet Dream by Greg Laswell (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0u_1MAygU0)

3+4) Said the Whale:

Emerald Lake (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PfwGwQic1c) or Loveless (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oSyfW7Ci1E)

5) The Ladder by Andrew Belle (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgJ2wgpT3vY)

6) He is We with Happily Ever After (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mitNR4N-tdU)

7)It's Alright by Matt and Kim (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PilVAqMMSnc)

Phoenix, Macklemore, The Jungle Giants, Cider Sky, Ben Harper, Snow Patrol, Goldspot.

And lastly, my secret grumpy ending song...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPUmE-tne5U

I can also listen to Frank Sinatra non-stop...but that's just me.

"Stronger" by Kelly Clarkson

A little predictable, but the words are spot on to lift my mood.