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Great points, thanks friends. SI is such an amazing place to seek support and advice from those who similar experiences...

I will stick to the "plan." I want my boys to spend time with their dad, absolutely. But I also think it's disruptive and unfair for him to think he can just swoop in when he pleases and dictate our schedule because it fits in with his needs. I will not allow the boys to become pawns. I'm going to ask that he pick them up on the 23rd, for a bit of extra time, and then have them back by the stated time of 11:30am on the 25th. Let him do all the running around since this is his choice.

One thing to note, I only agreed to fly to NYC because he insisted he would only pay for their flights and let them go as accompanied minors. At 7 and 9 I felt they were too young for that. As they age, I will not pay a dime. But I was caught between a rock and a hard place on that...

[This message edited by NWfleur at 5:56 PM, November 15th (Friday)]

The old plan, which was written when he lived 15 minutes away, states that we switch off every other year...Christmas eve, from 11:30 am, to Christmas morning, 11:30 am. So we would both always get to see them on Christmas, but just trade off who WOKE UP with them. This was his year to wake up with them as per the old plan (which again he doesn't follow at all).

Unfortunately, unless you legally change your parenting plan, it's not the old plan, it's the current plan so he is allowed to see them on his designated days.

Good idea on sticking to the plan. I stick to ours too. I rarely deviate. The less I have to communicate with that mother fucker, the better.