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prowoman ( member #40761) posted at 9:03 PM on Friday, December 20th, 2013
((JSS)) Your dday is still so recent. This is all a very new hurt.
I really would not suggest trying to contact the OW. Because if she refuted your husband's version of events, what would that do for you? IMO it's very unlikely she will verify his version of events. She'll likely be scared and trying to cover her ass cos the wife of someone she slept with is contacting her. Will you believe her over your husband?
I think at this point you and your husband just need to be very honest with each other. What will help you heal? What will help you feel safe? And he needs to help you and your marriage recover from this.
I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this, and especially while pregnant
. I hope you will read through all that is available on this site. It has been invaluble to me. Please be patient with this and be good to yourself, give yourself a lot of time to process and feel whatever you feel. To say that time will heal this is stupid, but it's still a very fresh wound and it WILL come with time that it wont be so fresh and raw. Sending hugs and strength
Girlietoo ( member #38719) posted at 11:46 PM on Friday, December 20th, 2013
Good people sometimes make very bad decisions. If you choose to believe your husband (as I did) then I will support you all the way.
I hope he hasn't lied to you and I hope he never does anything like this again- but there are no guarentees for any of us. All we can do is pick up the pieces and move forward on the path each of us chooses.
My husband has been very, very remorseful from day 1. I know in my heart that he feels horrible about what he has done. I am, by nature, a compassionate person. I couldn't bring myself to hurt my husband, even though he destroyed my life as I knew it.
In the end, I treated him with respect and while I was angry; I never once humiliated or punished him. Maybe I'm a fool, who knows, but I don't regret being a decent person through this. I know it was the right thing to do.
((Hugs)) to you. It is possible to make it through this.
Me- 40
Him- 47
March 9, 2013- the day my heart died
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