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PurpleRose (original poster member #33129) posted at 3:56 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
When I try to talk to my son10 on the phone he is always very uncomfortable. I know it's cause he feels disloyal to his dad. (We've chatted about it). I don't ever make a big deal about it to 10 because the poor little guy already feels so stuck in the middle as it is.
But why, then, can he chat for 15 minutes on the phone with the Doosh? Is it because I have never tried to make him feel guilty for wanting to talk to his dad? Because I've always encouraged him to call his dad every night?
There are some weekends (most, actually) that I don't talk to my son at all because I know he is going to act weird and uncomfortable.
Tonight I just wanted to say good night. It's Christmas Eve. The first time ever that I have not put out cookies for Santa and left reindeer treats with my son. :( I just wanted to talk to him and I got one word answers, blank pauses, and finally said, "can't talk huh?" To which he affirmed.
I typically leave the room when he calls his dad so he can talk openly without feeling torn.
If I hadn't reached indifference towards the Dooosh I'd really hate his broken ass right now. 
divorced the Dooosh 8/13
*****************************
Dance like nobody is watching,
Text and email like it will be used in court someday...
IrishLass518 ( member #34373) posted at 4:03 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
I feel ya on this one. IrishLad is very unsure about if it is okay to talk about his Dad to me due to Dad's over the top anger if IrishLad brings me into a conversation. I have noticed that he is a little more comfortable because he knows that he can talk to me. I want him to have good times and memories with his dad. I just can't make them for him.
Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"
Gemini71 ( member #40115) posted at 4:03 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
That really sucks. What do you want to bet that the Dooosh was standing right there listening in? My kids are a little older, to I text them. They know I'm thinking of them, and they can reply whenever they have the privacy to do so. As your DS gets older, he'll really resent the Dooosh's restrictions.
DSs 21, 16, 12
About my Ex:
IDK
IDC
IDGAF
Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 4:06 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
((((PR)))) I haven't reached indifference toward the Dooosh, so I'll hate his broken ass for you. Jackass.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 5:44 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 5:49 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
Clearly he's inhibited because of his father. That's just so wrong. I'm sorry. You deserved to have a nice phone call with him on Christmas Eve.
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 7:13 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2013
(((Christmas hugs)))
You are such a sweet mommy. I am sorry.
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
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