This Topic is Archived
2goodannie (original poster new member #41967) posted at 4:04 AM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
My WH's birthday is this week, do I acknowledge it? I am trying to stick to the 180, even though we are living in the same house. I took the kids shopping to get him a few gifts, but I am struggling with this. I have celebrated 20 birthdays with him. He told me that there has been NC with OW, but I don't know if I believe him and if that is true, I am curious if she will come out of the shadows and make contact with him on his birthday...but then, why do I care?!
KatieG ( member #41222) posted at 8:21 AM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
I read your profile and as you're doing the 180 and it says no gifts its a tricky one.
Personally, I think, in the spirit of 180, give a neutral card and maybe a small token gift. If only for the children to see you are strong.
DD#1 - Oct 13
"Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive" - CS Lewis
wonderpets ( member #35901) posted at 12:32 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
IMO, taking the kids to get him gifts is effort enough. Tell him happy birthday and be done.
NeverAgain2013 ( member #38121) posted at 2:32 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
IMO, taking the kids to get him gifts is effort enough. Tell him happy birthday and be done.
^^^^^^^^ THIS. ^^^^^^^
Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.
Annonymouse ( new member #41876) posted at 5:22 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
Thanks for posting this question. My WH has a bday coming up and I'm torn about what to do. We're in the beginning of R, but I don't want to seem desperate.
Me BS 43
Him WS 44
Married 19 years
D Day 12/28/13
Recovered
inthedark14 ( member #41924) posted at 6:08 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
I'm in the same boat , WH BDAY is tomoro and I ALWAYS throw him a party, usually just a small dinner with our few close friends and few family members and the kids always look forward to it, I'm not doin the 180, idk IF I will havnt decided yet, but I am not throwing him a party this year but We r just having a small celebration with just us and the kids, went going to our vacation home(where the A took place , I kno I must b The dumbest person alive) but I am doing it for my kids,not him, bcuz I'm TRYNG to b as normal as I can in this very abnormal situation. I am NOT buying him a gift or a card , I will take my kids to the store today so THEY can pick him out a card & gift but I won't pay for it I told them to ask him for money this morning lol so I feel for u
WH: 39/BW:Me,32
Married 14 years in March, 2 Beautiful children 8 & 12
D-Day: Xmas Eve 2013-worst day of my life
"The most expensive thing in th world is TRUST, it takes years to earn and just a matter of seconds to lose"
Getting to Happy ( member #35200) posted at 6:36 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
Why would you buy a gift or celebrate with anyone who lied and cheated you, tried to blow up your family.
The fact that you are still around is his gift, a really big gift.
And that skank better not show show her ugly face. 
Better yet buy him a can of 'Whore-be-Gone' for his BD!
GAH!
WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...
Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown
2goodannie (original poster new member #41967) posted at 10:51 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
Thanks Getting to Happy for the laugh! It has been a long time since I've had anything to smile about. 
Gift=me
mandan66 ( member #40075) posted at 10:57 PM on Thursday, January 9th, 2014
Yep---just what Wonderpets said:
the kids got him a gift; that's more than enough.
Me: 47; WW: 48
2 DS: 9, 14
M:18--T:19
DDay: Jan/13
Divorced and Done!--7/13
BrokenMomof2 ( member #41219) posted at 12:05 AM on Friday, January 10th, 2014
WH's birthday was about a month after d-day. I took our kids to get him a small gift from them and they made their own cards.
I managed to mumble Happy Birthday at the dinner table.
Me: BS, 30
Him: WH, 31, 1 month EA & PA
Married 9 years
Kids: 2 perfect boys
D-day: Nov 3, 2013
Working on R
gutfeeling ( member #41652) posted at 12:26 AM on Friday, January 10th, 2014
foolishlycluless ( member #41404) posted at 12:35 AM on Friday, January 10th, 2014
My WH's birthday was a few days ago, and since we are attempting R, I took him to dinner at the local sports bar so he could watch his hometown hockey team's game. Gave him a card too, talking about "bumps in the road" and he cried when he opened it.
Me: BW; married 36 years; now happily divorced.
XWH: Not a bad person; just made bad choices. Now living with OW.
2goodannie (original poster new member #41967) posted at 1:45 AM on Friday, January 10th, 2014
I did let the kids buy him a few things...at the Dollar Store! Totally passive/aggressive and it felt great!
This Topic is Archived
