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justabrokendream ( member #3075) posted at 5:27 PM on Tuesday, January 28th, 2014
I did not enjoy OLD while I was on it and don't really want to deal with it. My "picker" has always been bad so I'm done......
PhoenixRisen ( member #35912) posted at 10:00 PM on Tuesday, January 28th, 2014
dignityintact! It's not binary! Get that thought of of you head right now.
If OLD isn't working then there are at least a dozen other ways to meet people -whether they become just acquaintances, friends, or lovers
Here is where:
1. While traveling
2. Through volunteering
3. While out doing something fun (beach, boating, museums)
4. An evening class as a community college
5. Walking your dog in the park
6. Running a marathon
7. At the gym, market, store
8. Through friends
9. From a church or social group
10. At a concert, bar, restaurant
Now get out there!
UndecidedinMA ( member #33732) posted at 1:28 AM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014
As far as OLD I think you need to learn to read people just as in bar.
I have been with my OLD for 6 years so once you get through the whackos and learn to read people OL as well IRL you will do much better.
ME - BSO
Him - FWSO
OW - DBC Xwife
DDAY 09/14/11 ONS w/DBCxWOW with 4 mos EA
Solidly in R
Take2 ( member #23890) posted at 2:05 AM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014
momentary t/j:
Undecided you scared me - I saw your name on this post and thought - aw shit - what happened!? Glad to read what you wrote!
As to being on my own. Some of it I really like, I'm planning my second trip overseas, hitting the bucket list when I can, and I go out on occasion with friends. Now, I work with women and children, live pretty much in the sticks, don't want to go to a bar, haven't seen a meetup group that grabbed my interest locally...and in five years I have not met a single man my age -- literally.
And even though my sister met and married from OLD, I just can't wrap my brain around it.
I look around (and maybe this is just based on experiencing 30 lackluster years of marriage, and seeing my friends' marriages) I not sure I believe I'm missing anything. From where I'm sitting the grass doesn't necessarily look any greener over there. So I guess, I'm going to continue to water my own lawn for a bit. 
Hell, maybe I'll join the redhats! 
eta: no offense to any redhatters here! But I look goofy in a hat, let alone a red one!
[This message edited by Take2 at 8:17 PM, January 28th (Tuesday)]
"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?
ruinedandbroken ( member #29250) posted at 4:20 AM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014
I really *want* to be happy and content with the thought of spending the rest of my life alone, but I'd be lying if I said so. There are parts of it I have grown to like but overall I'm not happy. I'm on OLD for the second time now and I hate it more this time than I did the last. When it expires I'm done. If I don't meet someone the old fashioned way, then I guess I'll just be alone.
“People who cheat feel that life is for the taking, and that everyone deserves happiness no matter what the cost. I must remember these tricks if I ever have my soul surgically removed."
Me: BS 42. Him: WH 41 2 Kids 8&11
Married 14 yrs Together 21
gypsybird87 ( member #39193) posted at 5:33 AM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014
All I will say about OLD is that's how I met XWH.
Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you. ~ Alfred Adler
Letting go of the outcome is about the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. ~ LosferWords
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