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Newest Member: FaithGrace

Reconciliation :
DDay anniversary today

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 gettingthere2013 (original poster member #38232) posted at 2:02 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014

I'm finding myself having to constantly pull myself back from the thoughts/feelings/memories of that day,to the point where I'm almost hyperventilating. The fact that I can look back and see that we aren't the same couple,that he isn't the same husband-that helps. The fact that it looks like H has forgotten what today is makes it both harder and easier...with him not saying a word about it,I can do some meditation and self talk to calm myself. Not sure why I'm even posting.

Me:BW(44)
Him:WH(42)
Kids: Seven...yes,you read that right,and yes-we do know what causes them :)
Dday#1 1/29/2013(ONS with coworker)
Dday#2 4/8/2013(6 month LD PA with coworker,over for six months at time of discovery)
Separated,on road to D

posts: 115   ·   registered: Jan. 23rd, 2013   ·   location: South
id 6661513
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hurtingarmywife ( new member #38690) posted at 2:07 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014

I can relate to what you are saying! My DDay is coming up in 2 days. I have been thinking how this day will go and what we should do to acknowledge it. I still don't have any answers. Hopefully, I will do what you are saying and that is to try and think about the positive changes that have taken place the past year. Good luck!!

Me-53

Him-54

DDay-Jan.31,2013

Married 30 years

[This message edited by hurtingarmywife at 8:08 AM, January 29th (Wednesday)]

posts: 39   ·   registered: Mar. 11th, 2013   ·   location: midwest
id 6661520
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WarpSpeed ( member #32051) posted at 2:18 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014

Four years ago today I returned home from a business trip to find a half empty closet and a note on the bed. I didn't know at the time why she had left, but for me this is my DDay.

Not sure why I'm even posting.

You're posting because you're processing and trying to heal and trying to rebuild your life. Glad you're here to help with a bad day.

Hang in there. You are among friends.

Me: BS (58) Her: fWW (57)Married 28 years
2 awesome sons graduated college in 2015
She left Jan 2010, She filed Mar 2010, Div final May 2010, She shared it was an A July 2010, Remarried Aug 2010

posts: 1536   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2011   ·   location: Dallas
id 6661536
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kalimata ( member #42104) posted at 2:21 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2014

So sorry to hear about this tragic event in your life. I can imagine how hurtful this anniversary would be for you. Don't keep your feelings bottled up. Tell your WH so he knows how you feel. A hug from him might make it easier. Try to make new memories on this day instead of remembering the bad. Go for a nice walk, or an expensive dinner. something else to take your mind off of this day.

posts: 191   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2014   ·   location: USA
id 6661539
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