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Newest Member: johnnygr

Reconciliation :
Selfish or Broken

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 Undone1 (original poster member #37683) posted at 9:14 PM on Friday, February 7th, 2014

I have been thinking alot about my empathy for my fWH. When I think he was selfish, enjoyed his 3 year stint with OW, I have no empathy for him. I feel stuck in both R and healing as a result.

I know the underlying reasons he had an A, and he is remorseful and doing everything he can to be a good H. When I am able to see his brokenness, I feel more able to see his humanness and have empathy for the choice he made. But I don't stay in this place with empathy very long. Perhaps it is my sense of "fairness" that is keeping me stuck. NOthing about an A is fair.

Does anyone else have difficulty finding empathy or feel stuck?

Undone1
Married 10+ years to my high school sweetheart
DDAY 10/27/12
Me 55
WH 55
Blended Family: 25, 21, and 20
Married 10 years
"The Universe Unfolds as it Should"

posts: 301   ·   registered: Dec. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: Missouri
id 6675739
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IamDyingInside ( member #41054) posted at 10:16 PM on Friday, February 7th, 2014

Touche'! I am having a hard time with this as well but I am very early in my pain, emotions, thought processes about it all. I am just getting to where I can read a book on healing myself from this crap sandwich that was shoved down my throat. I hope you can discover what it takes to get you through it! Sorry, not a very helpful post but wanted you to know I feel you!!

Me: BW (41)
Him: WH (41)
2 Daughters - 20 and 16
Married 19 years, together 24 years
DDay - 09/08/2013
NC - 10/10/13 Broken 10/11/13
I feel like we are both trying R but I am just so skeptical of everything!! Hell, I don't know much right

posts: 78   ·   registered: Oct. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Lost in USA
id 6675829
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