This Topic is Archived
broken313 (original poster member #39006) posted at 9:32 PM on Tuesday, April 8th, 2014
I am in a bad place right now. Dday 1 just passed. R halted. I think I am blowing even the smallest things out of proprtion, A related or not.
Eg. Him restarting his new weight loss/ exercise plan and not telling me about it.
Most discussions end without resolution because FWH cant stand conflict and exits. I stew for days... This is wearing me down. MC had no suggestions. How do you guys do this? Seems we just didnt have such a constant flow of negativity in our M pre A.
Me 42
FWH 39
3 kids, 13,8,6
Dday 3/30/13
R- fragile
karmahappens ( member #35846) posted at 9:38 PM on Tuesday, April 8th, 2014
MC has no suggestions...WTH?
He needs to get into IC, conflicat avoidance is a marriage killer. He needs to deal with his emotional issues before he is able to be a healthy partner for you.
You are probably blowing things out of the water because you feel overwhelmed. There are ways you could be processing better and communicating differently with your husband.
Have you considered IC for yourself?
At the very least I would get a new MC, if they cannot navigate the waters through an A you will be struggling with them.
(((hugs)))
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd
Morhurt ( member #40166) posted at 10:03 PM on Tuesday, April 8th, 2014
First of all, IMO, you're not necessarily blowing thins out of proportion. I think it's completely reasonable to expect your H to communicate any new activities or changes in his schedule or whatever. For him to start a new exercise regime and not tell you... That seems like grounds for you to be upset. How you deal with being upset, and how he reacts, those are the key things here.
MC needs to be helping with the communication piece. Big time.
Me: BS
Him: FWS
M: 15 years
4 lovely daughters
Working to rebuild.
This Topic is Archived
