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OK now ( member #14459) posted at 2:11 AM on Monday, April 21st, 2014
When you think about it, she is in the awkward position. She has to make the decision not you. As long as you are friendly and cooperative there is nothing you have to do. Show no hostility and leave the ball purely in her court.
If she stays with OM thats her decision; you cannot influence it.
If she returns to the marriage thats her decision; you cannot influence it.
Just move on and keep her in the back of your mind in case things change. Don't count on it and there is nothing you have to do; the onus and responsibility for making a bad decision is 100% hers.
Not a bad position for you to be in since you risk nothing. She however could lose big time from her actions.
momof1girl ( member #41074) posted at 2:53 AM on Monday, April 21st, 2014
I miss my best friend too... but he's not mine anymore. Keeping NC is definitely hard and I struggle daily with not throwing myself back at his mercy and hoping he lets me back in. But I remind myself that he cheated, he lied, he hurt me and I deserve better than that.
D-Day: Oct. 1, 2013
Together 15 years, married 7, 1 child, age 7.
WH: 37 y.o., EA/PA since March
OW: 26, 1 child (not WH's)
Me: 34, BS
Separated Nov. 16, 2013
Does a wedding anniversary still count if you are separated?
Caretaker1 ( member #42777) posted at 4:22 AM on Monday, April 21st, 2014
Ok now.....being nice and getting the divorce is not always possible when kids are involved and custody issues. I'd love for the divorce to go smoothly.
DepressedDaddy (original poster member #41521) posted at 12:41 AM on Tuesday, April 22nd, 2014
@OK Now - I appreciate the feedback. I am having a big conflict of not wanting to take her back because of her actions. The best friend that I am missing is not the same person she is now.
I am getting to a point of just backing off completely, but we still have certain level of contact because of our D and DD arrangements. Trying to keep it strictly business, but I have to admit that it breaks down at times.
Thanks for the support and info.
Since D I have become DDaddy 2.0 - or better known as DevotedDaddy
“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so."
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