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New Beginnings :
Is your new beginning 'never to date again'

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strad ( member #41509) posted at 1:41 AM on Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

I simply plan on having a great life, regardless of who is along for the ride, or not. For the moment though: after 26 years of marriage, being single feels amazing!

Me: BW, 57
d-day 10/1/13
married to WH for 26 years
1 adult son
Divorced 3/21/14
The cheaters got each other, and I got a life

posts: 103   ·   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: United States
id 6813253
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h0peless ( member #36697) posted at 5:12 AM on Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

I haven't dated, and until very recently, I was pretty sure I would never want to again. Now I can sort of see the appeal, although the thought of it is still pretty scary.

Give yourself time. Maybe you'll want to give it another shot someday, maybe you won't. Either way is fine.

posts: 3136   ·   registered: Sep. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: Baja Arizona
id 6813428
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ISPIFFD ( member #26367) posted at 3:04 PM on Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

I'm pretty much set on the never-again way of thinking. I wish I had more friends so that I wasn't alone quite as much as I am, but the last thing in the world I want is any sort of romantic intimacy. No offense intended and I do know this is a huge generality, but I'm not sure I'll ever stop thinking that all men are scum. I know there are lots of exceptions (my son and father, certainly), but it's just how I feel in general based on everything that's happened in my life.

Until that feeling goes away, if it ever does, I don't think I'll ever be able to believe in romance or trust anyone enough to get involved ever again. And even if by some miracle I did change my mindset, I probably won't date because I have no interest in the level of hurt that can come from being so open with anyone. So yeah, my New Beginning, even at 3 years out, is never date again -- I'm all about self-preservation now.

I'm very happy with my dog. I've discovered wine's pretty good, too.

[This message edited by ISPIFFD at 9:05 AM, May 27th (Tuesday)]

I'm done here; sick of 2 x 4s

posts: 2057   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2009
id 6813700
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LineInTheSand ( member #20399) posted at 5:46 PM on Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

Unfortunately, it seems that people no longer know how to "date". Dating used to be an interview process that folks used to gradually become more and more familiar with potential mates.

Now days, it seems that it is more like "Hello, I'm Jim". "Well Hello Jim, I'm Loosey. Wanna come to my place for the night?"

Exactly!!

While I'll never say never, it's no longer a priority for me. I do miss the companionship but I don't miss the stupid mind games and drama I've experienced.

And I don't want to deal with the nonsense of Facebook "friends" and hiding text messages etc. and stupid cell phones.

Don't want to be someone's "mother" either.

OKAY! I guess I don't want to date!! Are you happy??

HOWEVER, if I found a guy who doesn't own a cell phone, is computer illiterate, isn't an alcoholic, isn't addicted to porn/sex/drugs, is employed and is well....normal. Well, sign me up!!!

(Notice I didn't say anything about his looks??)

posts: 598   ·   registered: Jul. 25th, 2008   ·   location: West Side
id 6813925
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ItTookTime ( new member #43396) posted at 4:48 AM on Wednesday, May 28th, 2014

Thank goodness others have the same feeling. If I am " never" ready to date, I am okay being alone

DDay= March 22 2011
Divorced 9/29/2014
BW
2 kids

posts: 31   ·   registered: May. 11th, 2014
id 6814706
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