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homewrecked2011 ( member #34678) posted at 2:50 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Call his supervisor.
Go yourself to the police station.
Call child protective and have a case opened.
This is so wrong.
Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55
teeghan (original poster member #40859) posted at 3:14 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Thank you Homewrecked - I have called child protetive services and made a report - they have not done anything yet. I am definitely going to try to get a higher up in the police department to hear my compliants as well.
I agree this is beyond wrong.... I am still in shock. I am still wondering what the hell they saw to make them say they dont have a case and it was closing? How much abuse does it take for our justice system to really step up to keep the victims safe and put away the man that is causing all the pain, breaking all the rules left and right. Does it take until they are gone? I just am so shocked......
StillStanding1 ( member #40144) posted at 4:00 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
OMG Teeghan! No wonder you are shocked and enraged! This is just reprehensible and heart wrenching. Please keep your strength to keep fighting for your kids. Sending you prayers and hugs.
Me: BS50s Him: WH50s
M 25 years - DD DS DS
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday - 2/13, S for 1 year, now R
painfulpast ( member #41038) posted at 4:09 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
I am sick that they interviewed the abuser and decided that there was no case!!! HE'S THE GUILTY PARTY!!! OF COURSE HE LIED TO THEM!!!
I hate police, seriously. How dare this detective not bother to interview the kids but instead interview an abusive asshole and then send the kids back there.
Definitely go to his supervisor - his lack of care in this case is bordering on criminal neglect. Be sure to tell the supervisor that if your kids are abused again you intend to file charges against the detective division for criminal negligence or misconduct or any charge you can make stick. After all, any further abuse is solely because of their failure to properly do their job.
Lazy pricks.
DDay - 12/2010
Fully R'd - I love my husband
Jeaniegirl ( member #6370) posted at 4:22 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
I have seen two cases like this that horrified me. In both cases the judge actually held a hearing but still two babies (separate cases) were given back to an abusive parent and both were killed. No wonder a protective parent often flees with children.
"Because I deserve better"
Hrtbrken1 ( member #33802) posted at 6:31 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
I live in Georgia as well, and this just makes me so ill. Considering how much the lack of response to child abuse cases has been in the news lately, I am FLOORED by this detective's response. I agree, call his supervisor. If you can, PM me what county you're in.
Me-BW
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with
friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.
brokenblackbird ( member #29541) posted at 6:48 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Are your children in counseling? If they are, get them in. Counselors are MANDATORY reporters of abuse.
I assume with bruises and marks that have lasted 18+ days you have already taken him to a doctor but if not - take them to the doctor. Doctors and nurses are also MANDATORY reporters of abuse.
Do all these things. See all these people. Get yourself a paper trail that cannot be dismissed.
Call CPS and get the case reopened. Show them the photographs. Show them the doctor's report, the counselor's opinion, etc.
Time for the mama bear claws to come out.
Hang in there!
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 7:02 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
This just makes me sick. Im so sorry. Im so fucking pissed off for you and your babies.
This POS has beat you in front of the kids..stalked you..had a RO..there is a shit ton of evidence against this POS..all showing him to be an abusive asshole..and this fucking detective believes the word of a known abuser?? And he doesn't even bother to speak with the victims?
I agree...go to the police station and ask to speak to the head detective.
I don't see how they can say there isn't enough evidence here. I don't understand why they aren't speaking with the children.
I will pray that they won't suffer any further abuse this weekend while they are with him. Im sure he is pissed that they told.
Hey..he violated probation by leaving the state..what happened to that? Are they just going to look the other way on that too?
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
teeghan (original poster member #40859) posted at 8:09 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Hrtbroken you have a PM
Yes confused I have been at a loss of words over the last 10 months. He has stalked me, barged in on my very sick mother, telling her he would stop at nothing to get my kids, text me and ask me to come to his house to have sex and leave the next morning to go to work - and they have YET to ever do anything on a TPO violation ... he wont pay support, and I cant get him served as he wont answer the door and because he is self employed I can not get a garnishment so I am still fighting that.
And then yes NOW this - I am beyond upset. I am thinking of emailing our local news department in all honesty. I am truly at a loss of words. I have tried to file several reports of BLANTANT violations against my ex and every time the damn cops tell me it is a civil custody issue, take it to court we cant help you.
Keep in mind I let a LOT of what he does go. I only have tried to report major things and He still gets away with everything and anything. It makes me sick.
I tried to call the kids and they didnt answer. I am a basket case.
Yes my kids are in counselnig and the counselor has mentioned callnig CPS to file a report. I havent followed up with her yet but I believe her. She cant stand him and in my counseling sessions told me how he will NEVER stop. It is not about the kids, this is about control. He is still trying to control me. He even went after my best friend who is a cop (not same county as I live in and where I am trying to fight him at) but he is a cop. He loves his job and has done it for 12 years. He gave us a place to stay when we left that day back in October.
Well NOW my ex has the interanl affairs folks investigating him of using his 'police' power to get my ex arrested when It should have been me to go to jail that day. I was floored when I found out all the allegations my stupid ex put in a SWORN statement. My poor friend is not in great jeorpardy of losing his job over a idiot that gets away with anything and no one seems to want to stand up to him.
So I have tried to not ask him any questions. He was also floored on what has been going on with the legal system. He told me he lost faith in the justice these days. I know the feeling big time.
Here is my goals this week:
Contact the SHERIFF himself Monday morning and get a sit down meeting.
Follow back up with CPS to see about getting a case with them for the kids.
Finding an attorney to file emergency hearing in our town for Sole Custody NO Visitation.
Follow up with Counselor on her behalf of her reports.
Be back in counseling with kids and myself.
And maybe call local news depending on how the talking to the sheriff call goes.
Thank you all again for listening to me and giving me advise. I am a basket case this week - I just do not know what more they need for abuse... :(
teeghan (original poster member #40859) posted at 8:12 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Oh and confused - on the leaving state issue - Yes I most certainly did call his probation officer, which the info was given to me by the police station on who it was and who to speak to.
They are going to get his cell records to see where his phone pinged that day and if it is over state lines, then yes he will have what they call a revokation hearing. That is when the judge will revoke him to go to jail for x amount of days (usually 60 here where I am at)
I am not sure how they proceed on that. I just make a report - I dont get any other info other than they will definitely find out. I just cant believe this is my life. Was enough to be cheated on, then being abused, but now my kids. This part I can not handle. I am about to lose my marbles literally and I do not want to go do something I will regret :( But damn... when does it stop?????
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 8:17 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
I wish I could give you a big hug. Im so sorry. I can't imagine anything worse.
I had the same thought..about calling the news stations. I would wait until after talking to the sheriff and CPS, and your counselor. If no one can help, maybe that should be your next step.
Im not surprised he isn't letting the kids call you. Unless it's in the visitation agreement, chances are, he won't allow them to call you at all. He wants you to worry. I think he sounds insane.
I hate this for you.
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 8:31 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
WTF!!
What the hell is wrong with that detective?? What a lazy POS! How does he sleep at night knowing what is going on with your babies and doing nothing??
I am spitting nails for you teeghan.
I vote for the news media. Up here we have some wonderful "dog with a bone" investigators. They DO NOT let up with DSHS. And DSHS has been in so much shit they do not like to have everyone know how worthless they really are.
Yes, not letting your babies talk to you is just his messed up thinking of controlling you. Doesn't give a shit what your babies need/want.
NUKE THOSE FUCKERS!!!
Sending all my prayers and strength to you, and your babies.
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
hopefulmom44 ( member #44136) posted at 9:22 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Teeghan-
Hang in there. Be strong and keep up the fight for your little ones. Sending hugs your way!
Gemini71 ( member #40115) posted at 9:38 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
I don't have any advice, because you are already doing everything you possibly can. Just wanted to let you know that I am horrified at what has happened. Sending you and your kids prayers and positive thoughts.
DSs 21, 16, 12
About my Ex:
IDK
IDC
IDGAF
Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014
Hrtbrken1 ( member #33802) posted at 9:56 PM on Saturday, July 26th, 2014
Doesn't Atlanta CBS do investigative reports on things like this? I agree on contacting the news, FTG.
Me-BW
DDay 07/26/2011, 8 month EA/PA with
friend of our family. Months of TT.
DDay#2 Early spring 2012, confirmed EA with another woman.
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 12:52 AM on Sunday, July 27th, 2014
https://www.facebook.com/SafeKidsInternational
https://www.facebook.com/pages/I-Am-Custody-Battle-Strong/118955334937387
http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2011/08/05/read-excerpt-from-phyllis-cheslers-book-mothers-on-trial/
http://www.courageouskids.net/
http://www.momlogic.com/2010/01/custody_crisis_why_mothers_are_punished_in_family_court.php
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
nekorb ( member #40306) posted at 1:21 AM on Sunday, July 27th, 2014
Oh teeghan. I'm so, so sorry.
Stay strong. Stay safe. Stay LEGAL. Ok?
Sending prayers and thoughts your way.
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 1:38 AM on Sunday, July 27th, 2014
What!? He worked the case "hard?" My ass he did! All the pictures and the kids testimony should be enough. I can't wrap my head around this. Didn't he leave your daughter on the side of the road? What did the detective say about that? Was that just parental discipline? Screw that! Ugh! I'm pissed for you!
Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 2:41 AM on Sunday, July 27th, 2014
Go to every news station that you can with your children's photos, and offer the reporters the chance to blow, sky-high, a conspiracy in the police department to ignore documented child abuse, documented spousal abuse, and any other thing you can think of. Offer names of people who you've reported to and had no help from. Speculate on how much longer it will take until your children are raped or killed by their abuser. Go to the FBI and report that your children have been taken out of state by their documented abusive father and abused in another state.
You've done everything, Every Freaking Thing, that you were supposed to do and you've been shit upon by this PD at every turn. Time to go after them, and then bump this up the line to the media. I would also get in touch with your local state representative and make sure that they get photos of your children's wounds.
Screw the locals. They obviously are completely worthless.
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
Delilah169 ( member #43689) posted at 3:06 AM on Sunday, July 27th, 2014
(((teeghan)))
I was absolutely horrified after reading this whole topic. Someone said "Definitely go to his supervisor - his lack of care in this case is bordering on criminal neglect. Be sure to tell the supervisor that if your kids are abused again you intend to file charges against the detective division for criminal negligence or misconduct or any charge you can make stick. After all, any further abuse is solely because of their failure to properly do their job." Great advice IMHO. Put the fear of God into that police department regarding anything else happening to your babies.
You seem to have it all together, are doing all the right things. You MUST be sure his visitation rights are stopped before his PO puts him back in jail, cuz he's gonna be pissed, and he sounds like a scary, scary man.
My heart bleeds for you and your brave children. You are a wonderful mother, I am in awe of your strength. Thoughts and prayers coming hard.
Please keep us updated. . .
Me - BS, Him - WS
Her - POS WB Fake Friend
Married - 22 Years, together 25
One 22 yo DD
DD - 4/28/13, TT for over a year
Doing well with R
"Life might be a little simpler if we just got over it"
"It all seems so clear in hindsight"
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