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Divorce/Separation :
One of those days...

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 Futurefear (original poster member #43176) posted at 5:48 PM on Saturday, August 9th, 2014

So 💩 called last night and talked to daughter for abt 3-4 minutes. She asked him if he was coming 'home' soon. Ugh. I don't want him to come 'home'. I want him too move out. He basically lives with OW and her parents anyway...

My anxiety has been off the charts since last night, I'm dreading his return to the house and I can't get the 'why', 'what if's' to stop...

I want my life back. I hate this nightmare that my life has become. I wish the man I married wasn't so good at hiding his true self, that his charming handsome self would get his instead of riding off into the sunset happily ever after. I'm here functioning on exhaustion because without me, the kids have no one. He's proven that over and over again...

Just a very sad day...

me- BW him-cheater (2 during our marriage, still with dirty whore)
together 10 yrs, married 7.5
kids- 2 DD and 1 DS
DD#1-Jan 2014,#2-2/2014, #3-3/2014
Filed 4/2014, divorce final 5/2015

posts: 700   ·   registered: Apr. 20th, 2014   ·   location: Iowa
id 6903832
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HurtingandLost ( member #29322) posted at 5:57 PM on Saturday, August 9th, 2014

Its tough, being the strong one for the kids, running on empty. I get it. But you already know you can do it because you've been doing it for so long without him anyways. Harness that strength and pick yourself up, take a look in that mirror, and remind the person that's there looking back at you that you are better than his bullshit. You didn't lose anything, and the OW didn't win either.

BTW: OW lives with her parents? Really? Which high school was he trolling?

Fbh

posts: 1511   ·   registered: Aug. 16th, 2010   ·   location: WI
id 6903839
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 Futurefear (original poster member #43176) posted at 7:43 PM on Saturday, August 9th, 2014

Thanks HurtingandLost for the vote of confidence. I'm not feeling it at all today.

But you are so right!! I have been doing it by myself for a long ass time!! He checked out before my little guy was even born, sniffing around the OW...gag. Who does that??

And I needed the laugh! Yep the OW lives with her parents, calls them her 'roommates'...and they allow him to stay there...unbelievable. She's 28 by the way, 12 yrs younger than me so so so so proud of her man and the fact that she's taken him from me, now I'm the bitch that is using the kids against him...whatever. No pity from me. They both knew what they were doing. Period.

me- BW him-cheater (2 during our marriage, still with dirty whore)
together 10 yrs, married 7.5
kids- 2 DD and 1 DS
DD#1-Jan 2014,#2-2/2014, #3-3/2014
Filed 4/2014, divorce final 5/2015

posts: 700   ·   registered: Apr. 20th, 2014   ·   location: Iowa
id 6903904
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bigskyblues ( member #36759) posted at 11:11 AM on Sunday, August 10th, 2014

Futurefear, you will get through this, I suspect you've been carrying the emotional family load a heck of a lot longer than you even realize. You have done it , you will keep doing it, one day at a time until your new life begins.

Please focus on your needs, be a great mom, and in the end the payoff will be that your children love and RESPECT you!

Wishing you strength to get through this!

BSB

BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!

posts: 277   ·   registered: Sep. 8th, 2012
id 6904332
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