I hear you, Hoosier. My WH is a Boy Scout leader who, each week for years, has been vowing to be "trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent" while screwing a MOW behind my back. He invited this same OW to attend church with him on the Sundays I did not go, and held hands with her -- "discreetly", he says -- during the service. Yes, cheating in church.
It's kind of hard to reconcile the hypocrisy, isn't it? And SOOOOO tempting to out them to those who think they are pillars of the community.
I have not, as of yet, because if we decide to R, I don't want that many more people second-guessing my decision. But it made me so ill that I have stopped going to church altogether, and only attend Boy Scout events for the short periods that I can tolerate pasting on a happy face.
Ultimately, you should decide what is best for YOU, and then do it.
Me & WH: 50+, married 23 years, 4 kids, now D
DDay: 3/5/14, 7 yr LTA plus multiple ONS
Conclusion: Some things are just too broken to be fixed.