This Topic is Archived
Twicecrushed ( member #50258) posted at 2:43 AM on Thursday, March 23rd, 2017
A good friend of mine's ebil said to her "what's the problem, it was only hookers". Oh, so that makes it all ok then! 
Me-BH 50
The Princess-WW 47
Married 23 years
2 DDs 14 and 11
1st DDday June 1998 - 2.5 year PA
2nd DDay April 2015 - 3 month PA
False R for 13 months the A never ended, just deep underground.
Divorced 8-31-2017
dejavu2 ( member #54508) posted at 2:44 AM on Thursday, March 23rd, 2017
After Dday #2, MC assured me that WH wasn't cheating and that I needed to let my suspicions go and move on if I wanted to preserve our marriage. I took her advice to heart and did my best to rug sweep and "get over it". Approximately 10 months later, WH announced that there was another women for a couple of months and that he was leaving me for OW #3. I gave up on counseling and now you folks are my treatment. 
narrowmiss ( new member #57847) posted at 2:49 AM on Thursday, March 23rd, 2017
"She fucked a girl. That's pretty hot. Maybe you can wrangle a 3 way."
-My well meaning brother
AngryandhurtinFL ( member #56503) posted at 9:24 AM on Thursday, March 23rd, 2017
I am part of a small group that is focused on the BS's recovery. One woman in the group said that she is African American and Indian and that men of color are expected to cheat. As long as they provide a roof over your head and as long as they are not beating you, then you are supppsed to take it.
Another member chimed in and said that she is not AA, but her husband is and her MIL said that women settle down before men do and to give it time. She actually agreed with the statement.
I didn't want to start nothing, but I am African American and I have never heard this crap before, so I just remained silent.
Me: BS 42
Him:WH 46
Married 13+ yrs
DS 4 yrs old
AP: A coked out chickenhead felon.
DDAY #1 Nov 2016
DDAY #2-3 (due to TT) 12/2016 and Jan 2017
UKgirl ( member #17062) posted at 12:18 PM on Thursday, March 23rd, 2017
There are just a couple of things MIL said that I have never forgotten. Not mean or nasty, just plain WTF?
When I disclosed fWH's affair and who it was with (his ex-fiancee)
"But she's menopausal!!"
Yeh, and......? She wasn't menopausal when they started the LTA. Besides, what does that have to do with anything?
Discussing why WH would have an affair at all:
"Well, he is a very complex man"
My reply: "No he's not, he's just a very selfish man"
I think the most common ignorant piece of advice the BS is given is "Move on" and "Get over it" You have to remember that most people simply do not understand.
Affair1: Dday 30/07/06 LTA: 5yrs ex-fiancee Affair2: Dday 04/09/20 9mths another XHSgf.Me/BS, still young. Him/WS, old. 4 grown boysHaving an affair because you are unhappy is like eating Ex-lax because you are hungry - unfound's mom
Wool94 ( member #53300) posted at 7:14 PM on Friday, March 24th, 2017
Hearing the words get over it or move on makes me want to give a good jumping 360 hook kick to someone's head. Here, let me kick you in the knee and break it. Now get over it. Unfortunately, even that only takes a few months. This takes forever.
D-Day #1: April 7, 2016
D-Day #2: May 21, 2016
D-Day #3: June 7, 2016
Me: 1975
Her:WW (amn8r) 1981
Son 2006
Daughter 2009
"God not only loves you, but He actually likes you. "-Stephen Hooks
"My faith is mine now."
theakronborg ( member #55770) posted at 7:26 PM on Friday, March 24th, 2017
I actually was able to laugh this one off:
From my mom: "Well, at least it isn't like he was having an affair." Cuz, hiding money and paying for sex is so much better. 
From my sister to WH: "There are worse things"
She's never been married, never in a long-term relationship. I put it down to just being ignorant. But really? And to him?
Me (call me Thea): BW - 40s
xWH - 40s
2 teens
M 18 years at DDay Aug 2016
Currently S, mediating D
This Topic is Archived
