SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Ditto on "this isn't a failure"! This is what dating is supposed to be about. I think at 3-4 months we should be still asking the questions of Are we compatible in the long run? Will my needs be met in the long run? Am I growing as a person in the long run? And if the answers are "no" then we thank the other person for the lovely time, end the relationship as nicely as possible and move the heck on. The hurting another person sucks when we are the dumper, the being hurt sucks when we are the dumpee, but letting the other person go to find their "person", the one with whom perhaps they click on all levels, is the kindest thing we can do.

Take some time to reflect. Take some time to write down what you learned from this relationship, what you will not compromise on next time.

I ran into someone this weekend whom I haven't seen in a long time, she asked me how my relationship was going. Without over thinking my answer I said "I am so glad I didn't settle or compromise on what I wanted in a partner because I've found it all with my SO". I believe it is out there for you too.

I agree with the others who are encouraging you not to view this as a failure. Dating is about discovery.

Also as an aside, the man I'm currently dating is British, and he's anything BUT stuffy in the bedroom. In fact, he routinely asks me what I want/need/like and isn't bothered by me being vocal or adventurous. I've been told by several people that British men tend to be a little more reserved and less vocal, so I'm not doubting that cultural norm, but I guess I wanted to share this because I don't think it's something you have to accept as ok (and I don't think anyone else here feels that way either, to be clear) because it's 'typical' of British guys. He should be willing to try to meet you halfway. You deserve someone who will prioritize your sexual happiness, so long as what you want and need is respectful to him as well, ya know???