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Newest Member: Longnightalone

General :
He's asking for a one sided open relationship

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smokenfire ( member #5217) posted at 10:41 PM on Thursday, September 21st, 2017

If I offered to do investments for you, and I kept losing you money, what would you do if I said, Oh well you've invested so much already, don't stop now! You would take your money away from me and write off your losses.

If love could change this man, he would be different then he is. Hell if love could fix things my ex would have been perfect.

Don't look at it that way. You sadly have given him years of your somewhat short life.

It's a red flag that he complained so much about his ex. That's a thing. Chances are very likely he cheated on her too and that's why she was so controling, it's a side affect of being cheated on, only it's called accountability.

Definitely look into trauma bonding and narcissistic abuse syndrome. It's applicable information regardless of the use of a diagnosis. All narcissists cheat and people who cheat tend to be narcissistic and use the same methods, gas lighting, lying, etc.

Don't food shop when hungry, or date when you're lonely
How others treat you IS a reflection of your SELF worth, but not your actual WORTH.

posts: 9253   ·   registered: Aug. 26th, 2004   ·   location: Central Texas
id 7979236
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Bobbi_sue ( member #10347) posted at 12:14 AM on Friday, September 22nd, 2017

Before me he was married for 20 years(he's 11 years older than me) and she controlled his every move and I think he went a little over the edge in experiencing things that he'd lacked for so long.

What did he lack? Sex with multiple women? Even if she was "controlling" which I doubt since that is about the most overused word in the dictionary, especially by people who want to make themselves look better than their ex, he probably promised to be monogamous with her when they married, and I'm willing to bet that he was NOT faithful to her! I'll bet his "sudden" addiction did not happen AFTER his divorce.

posts: 7283   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2006
id 7979304
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