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LivingWithPain ( member #60578) posted at 11:49 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
If she did this after only a few months of marriage then she is not marriage material my friend. You and her should still be in your honeymoon and humping like bunnies. Instead she's putting out for some other guy.
No, she's not wife material.
Go and see if you can get the marriage annulled. If there are no children it should be an inexpensive and straightforward task to do so. You could probably file the paperwork yourself and pay a filing fee.
Don't have sex with her. The last thing you need is to get her pregnant. Ask her to move out while you are at it.
And believe me, she is replaceable. It may not seem like it now, but you will replace her with a better woman.
Me - 39; WW - 36
Married 13 years
1 Adopted Son age 18
Still married and living together: attempting to reconcile.
solo ( member #57709) posted at 12:26 PM on Friday, December 7th, 2018
I don’t have much to add, other than you’re not alone. Same thing for me. My only love and only lover, threw it all away for a guy she worked with. Only difference is it happened further into our marriage. We were married about six years when she started a new job. She almost immediately started the relationship with him.
All that time I’d thought she was loyal, but it turns out she just hadn’t had the opportunity to betray me yet. Even then, I didn’t find out until many years later. I know it sucks, but take comfort that you found out early on, and didn’t have kids.
My advice is to walk away and never look back. I thought we got through it, only to find out she didn’t stop. Not saying it’s guaranteed that she’ll do it again, but the doubts will erode your soul for the rest of your life.
CatsEye ( member #69037) posted at 3:29 PM on Friday, December 7th, 2018
the doubts will erode your soul for the rest of your life.
This. So much this.
I understand the urge to save a marriage when you've invested so much of your time, effort, heart, and soul in it, but I don't think I could do it. Before it happened to me, I thought I might be able to, but not now. I know there are no guarantees with anyone, but when you stay with a cheater, you're choosing to stay with someone you KNOW you can't trust. I do not want to spend my life with someone I KNOW I cannot trust.
Best of luck to all of us betrayed spouses. I don't believe the cheating spouses will ever truly understand the depth of hurt and damage they cause or to how many people or how long it goes on.
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