SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Hello,

I will try this again to get some information. My husband had a 6 week sexting relationship with ex girlfriend. No physical contact but still utterly devastating. Over 1400 text messages on his phone in that time, all hours of the night and day. 10 phone calls, about 15 pictures and videos exchanged. I know this from the phone bill and he told me about some of the pics and videos. I discovered this cheating when my son and I were caught in their sexting on Facebook messenger on Christmas Eve with a charming picture of her naked boobs in the text stream.

Anyway. He apparently cannot remember anything about it because he erased the texts immediately. This might be feasible because honestly in 23 years of marriage his memory about everything besides old sports triumphs sucks. I unfortunately am a BS who needs to know ALL the details. My question is about the various applications that retrieve old deleted messages. I have tried 3 and there is nothing retrieved. My husband is a technology idiot, I have set up everything on his phone etc. And I have all the passwords. Why do these things seem to work for many other people but I am getting nothing?!

This is driving me crazy.

Thanks for any help.

try Drfone...I think that is the program that you can recover old text messages from a cell phone.

He remembers, he just doesn't want to tell you.

You can always ask her but some folks tell you not to talk to the OW.

Fonelab is one I hear mentioned.

Thanks... I tried that one and Fonelab to no avail. I have spoken to her, well texted, they have not had any contact since I caught him, for sure. I’m not a rug sweeper. Their stories line up about timelines and general content of texts but I’m a facts person and I want to see exactly what I’m dealing with here. She has erased everything they sent in a bottle of wine cathartic purging of the asshole ceremony so cannot forward anything to me.

He actually has never had a good memory about anything but I am sure there is some of it he remembers.

Thanks again,

[This message edited by NorthernMSB at 8:19 AM, March 4th (Monday)]

Northern,

What type of cell phone are you talking about?

Different phones may require different programs to recover messages. You can also take the phone to a professional to have them recover the messages for you. The cost for this varies, but I have heard the "geek squad" at best buy is good at this and reasonably priced.

To retrieve messages on FB messenger, google "how to retrieve deleted messages on facebook messenger".

Here is the response from google about android phones:

Method 1: How to Recover Deleted Facebook Messages on Android via Facebook Messenger

Step 1 Open the Messenger app and go to your recent conversations.

Step 2 Tap on the search bar and search for the conversation that you archived.

Step 3 When you see the desired conversation, select it and then tap Unarchive Message.

It is an iPhone 6 plus.

NOTHING works. it sucks.

Is the IPhone jailbroken? Until it is, no program will be able to recover the messages.

Google "jailbreak iPhone 6 plus"

Some iPhones have a security feature that wipes the phone when it's jailbroken. That could be a possibility too.

Also, updates can write over internal space which can cause permanent loss of data.

An iPhone does not have to be jailbroken in order to recover deleted messages and other media.

As I always tell everyone, Fonelab is good Dr. Fone sucks.

I've recovered messages from the iPhone 6 myself.

The issue you might be facing is that an iPhone 6 is so old that it is likely packed with data.

The way the recovery software works is that when something is deleted, it is not truly deleted, it is placed in an "unallocated space".

But, the less space available on the phone, the less unallocated space available, and then things start getting permanently erased and unrecoverable.

I think the way it works is chronological,older items are erased first.

However, you should be able to recover something, unless your husband made the effort to wipe the data off himself.

***

What happens when you try to recover? You should try to recover everything.

Also, if he ever backed up his phone prior to his deleting spree, then you can use Fonelab to retrieve the messages etc.

Just tried fonelab again and another one and nothing. Just the messages that are on his phone right now. He is barely technologically savvy to speak on the damn thing so would not have any idea how to cover his tracks that way.

I just tried to get him to write down a few facts about this situation because honestly all I have asked is for him to be nice to me. And I get to see his phone. That is it. He does not remember, it was not important to him (although it destroyed me so that sounds awful). And when I pushed it suddenly he turned the whole thing around AGAIN how it was my fault because we weren’t doing well (maybe not but a lot of that had to do with his bitter hateful attitude). And that nothing is good enough (he is TRYING to be nice) etc. Blah blah. And maybe I was asking because I wanted a divorce (what what?) and he wasn’t going to walk on eggshells forever...it has been 2 months.

So now I still don’t have answers, will never have answers, and I guess I should be grateful I caught him before he drove 6 hours and actually did all the things he told her he wanted to do. Yuck.

This sucks. Besides losing 25 pounds in 2 months from stress, this has been the most painful horrific time of my life. And I’m counting my mother dying, being raped back in the day, and ridiculous financial hardships. I am so freaking tired.

Thanks for your help. I won’t ever know.

Deleted Facebook/Messenger conversations can not be restored.

Are you using the free trials or the full paid versions of the software?

If you are not tech savvy, take the phone to a local place that can recover the data. Google up a few places.

Did he ever sync his phone to his computer? If he did, then whatever data was on the phone is in that version of the sync.

***

Your husband sounds cavalier, callous, and clueless. He does not seem to care about you at all. Your feelings did not matter then, and they do not matter now.

You are showing him your hurt, but he doesn't care. Typical cheater thought process.

Instead, you need to show him consequences.

Read around this forum to understand how you need to lay down the law.

If you can access the cloud they may be there

I had the best luck with a program called Decipher Textmessage. It was not necessary to root the iphone, and the software worked against iTunes backups and/or the phone itself.