SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I'm a BS but since there's no stop sign I figured I'd respond.

There is a lot of talk in the comments about being a no fault state and the affair not coming in to play. I disagree. I talked to a lawyer last year and he said that the no fault thing does not mean what most people think it does. It means that you do not have to prove someone is at fault to file for a divorce. It does not mean that if there is fault due to one persons infidelity that it won't come in to play during the divorce proceedings. He said a lot of the time it depends on the judge on whether they take the affair into consideration when making a judgment.

Good luck getting things worked out.

If you’re the one wanting an at fault divorce my state is a bad place to live. Adultery is having sex outside marriage which I did not do. I made a plutonic male friend online. BH would have to prove adultery which he can’t because it didn’t happen. Also since he stayed married and continued to have sex with me for 6 years my state says that means he forgave me and therefore no fault exists. (I know all this because several friends of mine went through this). It gets worse I don’t have to agree to the divorce either. He’d get it eventually but it could take years if I fought it (I won’t).

[This message edited by Root at 4:37 PM, April 1st (Monday)]

Root, if you live in a no fault state, the typical divorce means you would get alimony for half of the marriage. In your case, it would have been 14 yrs, but since your husband is retiring, you're kinda SOL.

At that time, you'd get half his pension like you said, and you are entitled to his social security if he has paid into it. If not, you may have to work for awhile to get yourself set up.

You also get half of everything built over the 28 yrs, so hopefully you guys have some assets and money saved.