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cocoplus5nuts ( member #45796) posted at 2:54 AM on Friday, June 14th, 2019
I really think they love the idea of who their spouse is.
I agree. That's why there are so many people who think they can change their spouses after they are married. If you think you need to change them, maybe they aren't the person for you.
I think my fch saw me that way. He had an idea of how a wife would be (based on his mother),and bent and squished me to fit that idea. He didn't really know me. After a few years, he realized I am not his mother, like a polar opposite, and he didn't know what to do with me.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 1:28 PM on Friday, June 14th, 2019
Oh, coco, being my mom's polar opposite was a requirement for me.... 
(W is, and that's one of the reasons I stayed.)
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
d-day - 12/22/2010 Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
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