SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I will not miss:

The lies

~Him making me feel like I'm was never good enough or his first choice.

~The random tales about other women he dated

~The constant fear that he's doing something shady

~The way he blamed me for all his "failures" but never acknowledged me for contributing to his success.

~Chewing with his mouth open

~Farting laying next to me

~His over inflated ego

~The cloud of drama, and chaos surrounding him

~His convenient sickness on every holiday that mattered.

~His lack of interest in his family or their feelings

~The ratty "wife beater" shirts, and baseball hats

~Telling me not to interject myself in conversations.

~Telling me to do as I'm told

~ Him telling everyone to leave the living room so he can watch the news, the BIG news, the evening news, and the world news.

~His entitled behavior, and general unkindness to others

~His predatory behavior, and grudges against anyone that has a different opinion.

Honestly I don't have enough space to list the things I won't miss. The more things I list the more I realize I didn't know him despite being with him for 23 years. He's a stranger and vastly different from the man I originally met and fell in love with. Logically he is EXACTLY the same man, but my eyes were closed.

I only have a few minutes, but here we go;

I won't miss sleeping on 12 inches of a queen sized bed because she splays out.

I won't miss coming to bed after staying up late with the kids and trying to write, only to find there are snacks and water bottles and pill bottles and wrappers and books and papers all over my side of the bed.

I won't miss the paranoia of wondering who she is talking to, why she stopped talking when I came in, who she is messaging, etc.

I won't miss the rejection.

I won't miss the criticism of my body.

I won't miss the criticism of my friends.

I won't miss the criticism of my family.

I won't miss the criticism of ANYONE that doesn't enthusiastically agree with her.

I won't miss her crazy driving.

I won't miss her road rage.

I won't miss cleaning her moldy coffee cups scattered around the house.

I won't miss her abuse of the things I make.

I won't miss her refusal to wear the gifts I planned out for her and had custom made (a silver, sapphire and opal pendant, and a white gold, ruby, and emerald wedding ring).

I won't miss her coming up with random pieces of jewelry sent to her by people she refuses to tell me about.

I won't miss her snoring.

I won't miss having to clean up her tampon wrappers from the bathroom or pubic hair around the toilet.

I won't miss having to clean her hair out of the drain or off of the shower wall.

I won't miss picking up her moldy plates she pushed under the bed.

I won't miss having to step around her boxes and piles of clothing she refused to let me clean.

I won't miss yearning for affection that she was giving to others but refusing to me.

I won't miss cleaning up my car after she uses it and brings it back filthy.

I won't miss having to treat myself for yeast infections after sleeping with her.

I won't miss looking at her and longing for contact while she ignores me in favor of her fucking phone.

I won't miss having to sit through the 20th re-watching of her banal vampire romances.

I won't miss having to tiptoe across broken glass because she is having a bad day.

I won't miss having to apologize for my anxiety, C-PTSD, hypervigilance, and depression.

I won't miss the urge to crack into her computer to see what she is saying about me.

I won't miss running every movement of my life past her to see if it interferes with her plans.

I won't miss having to be housebound for two and a half weeks while she spends family resources of flying across the country to engage in threesomes with married couples.

I won't miss listening to her say that she ONLY had sex with me to shut me up.

I won't miss her bragging about her sexual prowess when she just lays there or sticks her butt up in the air.

I won't miss having to watch what incense or scented wax warmers I use, so I don't offend her delicate senses.

I won't miss being unable to wear the stainless steel chain jewelry I make.

I won't miss hearing her bitch about not having enough space to herself when she invades every square inch of the house.

I won't miss cleaning up after her tantrums where she throws things around the house then leaves.

I won't miss doing damage control for her horrid behavior.

I won't miss covering for her transgressions.

i won't miss having to try to balance the finances while she funnels family resources into her business.

I won't miss having to find money for her to place orders that will keep her Director title.

I want to say I won't miss her.