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Newest Member: LonelyandUnsure

New Beginnings :
I'm gonna be okay.

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 unsure84 (original poster member #39565) posted at 1:55 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2019

I think I should probably start posting here now.

My quick backstory: Married a serial cheater with 3 D-Days from 2013 to 2019. Ended up getting a souvenir from the last one, which was really nice of her.

In the months since D-Day 3, A lot has changed. I served WS divorce papers and she signed them without a fight. We agreed to an uncontested settlement (which the courts adopted as an interim pending final order without issue) and our final divorce hearing is in January. We've split everything, we're living apart and our 50/50 custody schedule has been off and running for a few weeks now.

I have to tell you, I can't recall a time in the past decade that I've felt this good. My house (which again, I got without a fight) has been decorated to my tastes. My time with my DS has been amazing. I miss him like hell when he isn't here, but I fill the time with lots of cleaning, dancing, spending time with my dog and detailing cars - a hobby which WS always took issue with. It's all been very restorative for me, and I feel like I have a new lease on life.

I hosted Thanksgiving for the first time yesterday, too. Made everything except the turkey (which Mom brought) and people seemed impressed that a single dad could make a good sweet potato pie. All this time, WS had me convinced that I was to be out of the kitchen.

Of course, things haven't been perfect. I took quite a hit financially leaving WS. Money is tight, but I have a little savings and I've been picking up detailing jobs to bridge the gap. I'm also planning to turn the space above my garage into a cute apartment and rent it out to make my living situation more affordable.

I didn't believe you guys when you said life would be good once you left your WS. I did, and it's good. Not perfect, but a darn sight better than before.

Me: BS (35)
Her: WS (34)
One amazing DS (4)

3 D-Days 2013, 2016, 2019
2x EAs, 1x PA

Status: Done.

posts: 213   ·   registered: Jun. 16th, 2013   ·   location: Northeast
id 8474602
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IndependenceSoon ( new member #71760) posted at 3:00 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2019

Thank you for sharing! You are very mighty. I love to hear stories of those who have created a new life after the betrayal. Married 30 years, separated in January and divorce in process.

posts: 17   ·   registered: Oct. 5th, 2019   ·   location: CA
id 8474627
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 3:34 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2019

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6488   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8474641
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fareast ( Moderator #61555) posted at 3:39 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2019

Great update unsure84. Keepon, keepin on. I hope that your health is good. I know your WW gave you the horrific gift of an STI in her last go around. I hope you are healing and it is going well. Good luck.

Never bother with things in your rearview mirror. Your best days are on the road in front of you.

posts: 3991   ·   registered: Nov. 24th, 2017
id 8474643
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 unsure84 (original poster member #39565) posted at 7:06 PM on Friday, November 29th, 2019

Great update unsure84. Keepon, keepin on. I hope that your health is good. I know your WW gave you the horrific gift of an STI in her last go around. I hope you are healing and it is going well. Good luck.

Thank you so much fareast.

I'm healing, feeling good, and focusing on the health and happiness of my son and I. Life isn't perfect but I feel so much better than I did. I understand that there are gonna be peaks and valleys to this, but I didn't expect to feel this good this soon.

Me: BS (35)
Her: WS (34)
One amazing DS (4)

3 D-Days 2013, 2016, 2019
2x EAs, 1x PA

Status: Done.

posts: 213   ·   registered: Jun. 16th, 2013   ·   location: Northeast
id 8474768
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