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Westway ( member #71747) posted at 4:30 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
I'm feeling pretty worthless to be honest.
On one hand there is a feeling of relief and that a weight has been lifted, because it's been something I suspected was going to happen. But then i think if that was the case, then why the fuck couldn't I stop it so that's just what makes me feel like a loser.
Why? Why would you think of yourself as a loser? Because you have integrity? Because you're honest and NOT a cheater? Is that the definition of a loser?
Your WW is the one losing, and she will continue losing her whole life if she doesn't stop to figure out why she copes with the realities of life by entering in to fantasy land with other men.
Stop berating yourself and stop feeling down on yourself. You cannot afford a pity party right now. Now is the time to be proactive and secure your future.
Me: 52;
XWW: 50 y.o. serial cheater
Married 22 years, Together 24
2 Daughters: aged 16 and 20
DDay: 9/20/19
Divorced 12/03/20.
Dismayed2012 ( member #49151) posted at 4:51 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
Your WW has given you a gift 'tired'. She's shown you who and what she is while you still have a lot of good years ahead of you. Get yourself free from her as quickly as possible. Also realize that she's using suicide and self harm to guilt you into staying with her. Don't continue to fall for it. She's made her choices. Allow her to live with the consequences. Stop being the white knight. She's shown you that she doesn't see you as a lover but rather as a roommate. Don't disrespect yourself anymore. You have value beyond what you see. She's made her choices. Now it's your turn to make yours. Divorce her from your life. It's going to be painful, but you're worth the effort. The pain will subside and relief and happiness will take its place. Take care of yourself. I wish the best for you.
Infidelity sucks. Freedom rocks.
HarryD ( member #72423) posted at 5:05 PM on Tuesday, July 7th, 2020
You are not a loser !! You are being played by WW.
OM dump her, or else she would be with him. Or he married and not is leaving his wife. Same difference, she is dumped. So now she wants you to take care of her.
Leave her, this was not the first time, or it will not be the last time.
NaturalX ( new member #63733) posted at 7:58 AM on Saturday, July 25th, 2020
Dump her and don't tell the other guy about the baby. Why would you even care to tell him? I doubt he was thinking about you when he was railing your wife.
Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 4:00 AM on Sunday, July 26th, 2020
Sorry to be blunt, but dump and run. She is still seeing him, the A is going on.
Buffer
ZoeS ( member #62587) posted at 4:09 PM on Monday, July 27th, 2020
How are you doing Tiredhusband?
Do you have an update on how things have progressed for you? I hope you're holding together.
BW
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The heart is a muscle.
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