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Jambomo ( member #74853) posted at 10:26 AM on Sunday, January 10th, 2021
I think that when we find out about an affair, it really changes how we view our partner, we now view them negatively, we realise they are liars and that they did not care enough about us to not do something which they know will devastate us.
This is something I don’t think the wayward realises. They think you just forgive, forget and move on. Especially when it was a long time ago and they think that all the years of married life when they were a faithful and good partner, somehow makes up for it.
I think that you have to make your wife understand that her affair, and you finding out about it, has changed how you view her, how you feel about her and the marriage that you have had. She has to understand that these things have to be worked on for your marriage to survive because otherwise, you will stay as you are - unhappy and wondering, not wanting to love her anymore.
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