Karma, With this guy being her childhood friend; them working together for 4 years before supposedly starting an affair sounds very suspect. How has your marriage and sex life been before the pregnancy and since the birth? Was she distant? Did she sexually cut you off or scaled way back? When you think back on that time before the pregnancy, was there any issues that had your gut questioning the relationship?
Now that she has confessed to more, have you pressed her on getting more details. Like, does OM know he's the biological father. Why did they really end the affair and who really ended it? Have you been to her job to have your presence known? Visiting her for lunch or been to any company functions?
We have had many threads where the BH thought of his WW as his best friend and did not see any signs but when he describes his WW's actions, it seems to be such a huge disconnect from his description. Recently we had a thread of a BH who learned that he was not the biological father of both of his kids that were born 5 years apart. His WW purposely allowed her affair partner to impregnate her both times. That affair not only involved paternity fraud but also huge financial infidelity. Yea, she was in deep with her AP but the BH thought his wife was incapable of betraying him like that.
I mention that example to bring your attention to the possibility that your wife may have been way more emotionally involved with this guy than you realize. So please slow down and make sure you fully understand what it is you're forgiving. It is way to early to be all in on R in a betrayal that includes an OC and that additional facts keep being revealed.
I wish I had this site when I needed it. This site is a goldmine if you use it. Like others, I suggest you post often, even if it's just to vent. We're here to offer advice or just an ear. I'm praying that your situation is no worse than what has been revealed. Many of us know the pain of betrayal.
