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It's Over and I'm Lost

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antlered posted 10/27/2017 22:31 PM

This is simple.
1. Keep your job.
2. Stop all contact with your AP.
3. detach a bit from your MH husband. 9180)
4. Seek your own IC if you haven't already.

Your #1 priority is your kid, so priority #1...

Zwest posted 10/28/2017 11:31 AM

I've made some horrible choices, which have been completely out of character for me but I am working on myself.

If the things you did were actually out of character for you, you'd not have done them. You are the sum total of the choices you've made and that *is* your character. The first step is to look at yourself honestly because the truth is, your BS can get away from you. You are stuck with you. Your BS has had enough and is telling you so. Respect that. You've respected nothing else, so at least you could give that much.

whoami16 posted 10/30/2017 11:05 AM

Thank you all for your honest and insightful responses.

I have to consider while my infidelity may have been out of character for me, this is who I am. While I never thought I had the ability to do this I was obviously mistaken. I'm taking steps, counseling, reading, etc. to battle with the sad realization that I am capable of this and am not the person I thought I was. It's a hard sad pill to swallow.

My BH and I have been speaking. Trying to communicate and understand each other's emotional states. He is having a very difficult time and I feel I'm lacking in properly soothing him. I try to give him what he wants, whether it be space or discussions but I don't know what is and isn't helping.

I know only time will tell but my fear is there is no more time for us. I have decided to try to be the best FWW/FBS I can be until he decides this is just too much for him to handle.

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