Your husband has cheated throughout your marriage. And now he is making some half-assed efforts to appease you and assuring you that he cares for you.
You feel betrayed, hemmed in, alone, and don’t know which way to turn.
You have 3 little children...
You do not need to make a decision now. But neither can you afford to wait for things to get better. They/he likely won’t.
At this point, your energies are best expended on making you strong and emotionally resilient. Letting go of the outcome. Detaching from the drama and the emotions and instead focusing on practicalities.
Speak to an experienced lawyer. Get your ducks in a row. You don’t have to leave him now if you don’t want to. But get yourself in a position where you could.
But at the same time, try to do some things just for yourself. I know this can be hard with 3 children to care for. But try to be selfish! Get a babysitter if you can afford it. Enlist the help of family and friends. Do things you enjoy. Even if it’s just snatching an odd half hour here and there, reading a book, listening to music, looking at paintings...
And always remember you deserve better than this.
[This message edited by Geranium at 1:23 PM, November 16th (Thursday)]