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Divorce/Separation :
How do you kick spouse out? He doesn’t want to leave

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 Gottagetthrough (original poster member #27325) posted at 10:58 AM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

Spouse doesn’t want to leave or get divorced. House is owned by my relative. Relative ought the house 5 years ago for financial reasons (it was a great price & they hoped to make money when it sold) and also to help us out )Wh is bipolar and due to his impulse buying we always seem to have money issues.. we couldn’t afford a down payment on a home)

Relative write a hand written document that said we could live in the house as long as we were paying $1000 per month toward MY debts (we have erased all my debt that way) and now we have a verbal agreement that “rent” is our kids private school tuition. It also states that if wh and I break up, he leaves the house.

Wh and I both signed this handwritten document 5 years ago. Now he says he won’t leave. I’ve reminded him of the document and Wh says the law doesn’t work that way and I can’t make him leave.

[This message edited by Gottagetthrough at 5:00 AM, November 30th (Saturday)]

posts: 3843   ·   registered: Jan. 22nd, 2010
id 8475017
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Glashalffull ( member #69085) posted at 11:17 AM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

Have you taken the note to a lawyer? Even if the signed note isn’t legal enough to get him out of the house, I would still think that the attorney could guide you on how to obtain a successful eviction.

Be careful and stay safe. Anyone who doesnt want a relationship to end...and add bipolar disorder to it....can lead to taking desperate measures when their world is blown up, even though they are the ones who caused it.

posts: 80   ·   registered: Dec. 10th, 2018
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undertherug ( member #41580) posted at 11:19 AM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

I am not sure how laws work where you live, but can't the owner of the property (your relative) file an eviction notice? You need to see an attorney to find out how to oust him. Be sure to let him know what's coming; he may decide it would just be easier to leave under his own steam.

posts: 1077   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2013   ·   location: United States
id 8475020
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Overcomer1 ( member #70140) posted at 1:15 PM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

Can you just throw his stuff out of the house and change the locks? If he comes back raging, call the police and get a restraining order after? I don’t know. Just a thought. My pathetic excuse for a human being STBXH verbally and emotionally harassed me, until one night I was scared it would get worse. I called the cops. He was so angry at me for that, but not long after, he got his own place in town. He still acts like this house is his when he comes to pick up kids. But at least he’s not living here anymore and I don’t have to live in fear every night.

posts: 103   ·   registered: Mar. 24th, 2019
id 8475036
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Catwoman ( member #1330) posted at 3:12 PM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

You need an attorney to navigate this.

Cat

FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 27 and 24. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."

posts: 33182   ·   registered: Apr. 5th, 2003   ·   location: Ohio
id 8475076
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ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 9:30 PM on Saturday, November 30th, 2019

You need an attorney to navigate this.

Ditto. Instead of waiting for him to feel like moving out, start eviction proceedings with a L.

((((ggt))))

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

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id 8475206
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 6:26 PM on Tuesday, December 3rd, 2019

What did your attorney say about this??

Failure is success if we learn from it.

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Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 1:21 AM on Wednesday, December 4th, 2019

1) He doesn’t have to want or even agree to a divorce. You can file. It takes slightly longer, but the end-result is the same.

2) I’m guessing that with no witnessed or written agreement about the “rent” then your relatives could terminate the residence agreement. There is probably some law on that in your state stipulating some minimum time you have to leave. Maybe 30 days, maybe 3 months. Have them do that in a formal and legal way.

3) If you have filed then they can then re-rent you the home once the present agreement is over.

"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus

posts: 13191   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2005
id 8476777
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