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Sad in AZ (original poster member #24239) posted at 9:17 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
OIAL asked me to post this for him:
"I asked DS to kindly shut down my profile because I was spending far too much time on SI To the couple people that sent me a PM, I failed to respond because I, well, can't. Lastly my thanks and fond wishes to all."
So sorry to see him go. 
You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.
Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011
gahurts ( member #33699) posted at 9:18 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
I hate that he left.
"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie
timeforchange ( member #27454) posted at 9:20 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
Sad to see him go... He came so far and his posts often me laugh.
But maybe this was an inevitable part of his healing and a sign of how far he has come.
If you have contact with him... I for one wish him well and much happiness.
We will miss his posts.
Me = BS aged 43
2 boys, 13 and 9
DDay 1/19/10
Confronted him 2/16/10
Finally Divorced 8/29/12
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
Amazonia ( member #32810) posted at 9:23 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
Sometimes it's healthy to take a break from some areas of our lives. OIAL seems like someone who throws himself into life with a lot of intensity, and for some people, certain situations can more easily be an all-or-nothing. I know there are times when I personally struggle with moderation, and too much reliance on a community like SI can become distracting from "real life." Taking a step back can be healthy.
Kudos to OIAL for recognizing what he needs for himself to be healthy and taking proactive steps. I do hope he comes back in time, because I'd love to hear his updates, but for now, if this isn't a healthy place for him, I'm proud of him for recognzing that.
"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ
Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 10:34 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
I'll really miss him and his perspective.
You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright
gogirl ( member #26870) posted at 11:33 PM on Saturday, August 3rd, 2013
He is a good man and will be missed but of course wish him well. 
It's never too late to live happily ever after.
Bluebird26 ( member #36445) posted at 12:32 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Best wishes OIAL. We will all miss you around here.
Me: BW
Best thing I gained in my divorce - my freedom.
Life's good.
FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 12:55 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Good luck OIAL! We will miss you.
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire
259 ( member #22860) posted at 1:37 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
I mostly just lurk and read. I will miss his posts, he often wrote something that I could relate to.
wishing OIAL a happy NB
Me = FBS
Him = gone
things that happen in my life do not define who I am. I get to choose to be the best I can be, for me. cause I'm worth it.
tryingagain74 ( member #33698) posted at 3:01 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
I wondered where he went. I'm sorry to hear he's gone.
Take care, OIAL! Your fellow alum will miss you. 
FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley
seekingright2013 ( member #37991) posted at 4:08 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Aw shucks. I too will miss OIAL's posts and perspectives, and wish him well.
It takes some intestinal guts to post one's trials & tribulations and be willing to take shots (or 2x4s) from the peanut gallery. I am grateful to be able to learn from OIAL's perspective, and sure appreciated his open-ness.
The other thing is that it's really nice to have confirmation that there are good guys out there who are faithful. This would go for all the male BS's who post here, of course. In a world which sometimes seems full of selfish jerks, it was nice to read from someone who wasn't.
Wishing you well, OIAL. We will miss you.
Seeking
“I tramp a perpetual journey.”
― Walt Whitman, Song of Myself
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 5:39 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
Griefstricken25 ( member #29183) posted at 8:57 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Aww.
His humour and ability to laugh at himself was refreshing. I wish him well.
Me!
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011
She11ybeanz ( member #27457) posted at 11:59 AM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
I'm really gonna miss him....
"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"
ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12
better4me ( member #30341) posted at 6:17 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
I'm gonna miss him too, I love his sense of humor and self deprecating comments. I understand the need to take a break and how hard that can be when the fix is just a click away! (Kind of like OLD for me!) Please communicate all of this SI love to OIAL for us Sad.
DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!
little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 8:46 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
OIAL is such a great man. I wish him nothing but the best. I hope he comes back with updates... otherwise I will always wonder how he is doing!
Failure is success if we learn from it.
torn2bits ( member #28376) posted at 8:58 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
It was nice to have been a part of the growth process for him after infidelity. Real life is always more fun.
OIAL, good luck and much happiness to you! You will be missed.
Me: 45/WH (SA): 49
M: 26 years 3 kids over 10 yrs old
EA/ PA Dec. 2009 -Divorce halted
InnerLight ( member #19946) posted at 10:37 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Too bad for us! He was a great contributor and shared so personally that I feel like a friend has left town. I wish him all the best.
BS, 64 yearsD-day 6-2-08D after 20 years together
The journey from Armageddon to Amazing Life happens one step at a time. Don't ever give up!
persevere ( member #31468) posted at 5:35 AM on Monday, August 5th, 2013
We all need a break now and again. Hope he finds his peace and considers rejoining us if he'd like to at some point.
DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 7:12 AM on Monday, August 5th, 2013
Wishing him the best.
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
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