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PhoenixRisen (original poster member #35912) posted at 4:04 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
so I'm wrapping Christmas gifts and in the bottom of my wrapping container I come across a drawing from a Christmas of several years ago when we were visiting my sister.
The drawing had a doodle from one of my kids saying "mom" "dad" and their names - then BAM I'm flooded with memories of that particular Christmas when I was married and our kids had two parents at home. I can even smell the cinnamon that filled her kitchen - the memory was so strong!
Before I can stop myself I burst into tears.
My M ended over two years ago.... I thought I was settled and resigned to my new, single-mom life.... When do these triggers end?!
MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 4:10 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
(((hugs)))
Time and new memories will help these feelings to wane.
ISPIFFD ( member #26367) posted at 4:11 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
((((((PhoenixRisen))))))
I hate to say it, but it takes time...
I'm done here; sick of 2 x 4s
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 4:12 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
She11ybeanz ( member #27457) posted at 4:28 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
I've been divorced 3 years as of tomorrow...and still get triggers....but they lessen over time! Promise.
((BIGHUGZ))
"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"
ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12
StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 5:58 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
Time and new memories will help these feelings to wane.
this^^^
(((hugs)))
"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014
better4me ( member #30341) posted at 6:15 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
(((PhoenixRising)))
Holidays are the worst times for missing what "was" but really "wasn't"
DDay 11/17/2010 BW:58
Happily remarried!
broken2 ( member #16935) posted at 9:05 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
Time will help, really it will. I rarely trigger any more and if I do my next thought is how lucky I truly am to be away and gone from him.
ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 11:22 PM on Thursday, December 12th, 2013
Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now
persevere ( member #31468) posted at 4:59 AM on Friday, December 13th, 2013
This is my third Christmas post Dday - it's the best one yet but memories still hit. ((Hugs))
DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.
wontdefineme ( member #31421) posted at 5:01 AM on Friday, December 13th, 2013
Just keep telling yourself three to five years to work through the trauma. I had not come to SI in a while and didn't need to be here. One stupid text, which I ignored, bought me back again. I keep telling myself, three to five and the finish line gets closer every day.
Eranda ( member #6010) posted at 9:07 PM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
They end- believe me. I'm one of the old-timers around here and I can tell you it gets better. A LOT better.
Now when I think of things that happened back then, I don't much care anymore. I like my life now better than I did when I was married. Memories are just that- memories. Without any emotional crap to go along with it LOL.
I think of that time as just something that happened, and now it's over. Nothing more, nothing less.
You will get there.
My Blog: http://allofthewaystohell.com/
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 11:07 PM on Saturday, December 14th, 2013
NaiveAgain ( member #20849) posted at 1:50 AM on Sunday, December 15th, 2013
Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.
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